Post # 1
So Darling Husband and I have been living together for a few years now and its usually me doing the cleaning. He has never cleaned the toilet, mopped the floors, cleaned the shower…etc. He occasionally does the dishes and will take out the trash if I have it all bagged and ready and will do the laundry only if I ask please. I’m not sure how it got brought up but it turned into its “unnessecary” to clean the toilet, mop the floors, clean the shower (ya know all the tedious stuff)…ohhh reallllly I thought…he says well its never dirty. HA!!! exactly because I’m cleaning it. Not by any means shape or form am I a neat freak, but about once a month or so I’ll clean the shower and mop. I do the toilet once a week…I vaccuum as needed(once or twice a week). Darling Husband is not sloppy either but he does leave cups, dirty clothes etc around. I also do the bills and organizing of things so I am usually busy. I really do not mind doing all of this but the fact that Darling Husband said it didn’t need to be done appalled me…so I am now on a cleaning strike. I want him to see how dirty things really do get when I do not take care of them…I’m not causing a fight about this situation with him I just want to prove a point 🙂 anyone else ever had a similar situation? who does most of the duties in your home?
Post # 3
More power to you, honey.
My husband and I had this argument a few years ago and we made no progress. He does a LOT around the house (we have four cars and our property is expansive) but almost never helps me with actual cleaning unless I ask or sometimes bribe. It started off totally fine where we cleaned together every week but then he said we were doing it too often. To compromise I did the cleaning when I thought it was dirty, we both cleaned when we both thought it was dirty. The difference is I always cave before he does because he has a higher tolerance for filth. I’m sorry but with a dog and a cat cleaning the house once a week is a MUST. He disagrees. I’m sick of fighting about it, so I just do it. Defeatist.
Post # 4
Any chance you won’t cave first?
Post # 5
I’ve tried this a couple of times in an effort to get my husband to be more proactive about cleaning. It never worked. I always cave first. It just doesn’t bother him to have filth around him. Good luck to you though!
Post # 6
Goodluck… from what I’ve seen it takes QUITE a while before a guy feels the need to clean a toilet and even longer to clean a shower… they never notice the stuff on the floor to vaccum & just don’t seem to get bothered about those things like we do.
Here’s to hoping that he sees it and he cleans it though! Goodluck!
Post # 7
Good luck! I have tried this MULTIPLE times, however I end up caving and doing the dishes or scrubbing the shower 🙁
Post # 8
I had this fight with my ex all the time. His house hasn’t been cleaned now in over a year and he told me last night he definitely sees all the work I did. His bathroom defies description. Yuck! He wanted me to help him find a cleaning lady for our daughter’s sake. LOL He even tried to hire me! Your Darling Husband will see the light eventually but you will need to move back home with your parents in order to let it get that gross. Or go send him to live with my ex for a while LOL. Seriously it is very nasty. He is at a point he doesn’t even want to use his bathroom!
Post # 9
Good luck! Hopefully you won’t cave first – I know I would. I’m no clean freak by any means, but I have a limit, and once it gets to that, I can’t stand seeing a mess.
Post # 10
@Bao:.ohhh reallllly I thought…he says well its never dirty. HA!!! exactly because I’m cleaning it.
HAHA! So true!! They just dont realize it. It might be a quick scrub but its still a pain in the ass that needs to get done. Good luck with the strike!
Post # 11
HAHAHAHAHA “it’s never dirty” My Fiance has said this too, and I said, Who do you think does it…a little fairy? THE FAIRY IS ME!!!!
I went on a strike a few months ago and I eventually got fed up. I think he got the hint and now thanks me for cleaning and now asks if I want help.
Post # 12
Unfortunately most men have a different standard of ‘clean’ to women, and therefore would need to be living knee deep in take away boxes before actually thinking it’s time to clean up. Just a generalisation, my SO certainly wouldn’t mind living that way if I didn’t clean up.
He does appreciate when it’s clean, and he does make effort to maintain it – just not for very long..
Post # 13
I speak from experience, guys seem to be able to overlook the dirt and filth for a verrrry long time. Good luck to you.
Post # 14
Good luck… I can imagine that it’ll bug you more than it bugs him though.
Post # 15
Cut off his resources! and spill some juice on the kitchen floor! lol
Post # 16
Yeah good luck with that! Chances are it’s going to irritate you more that things are getting durtier and durtier and either you will cave and just do it or you will throw a fit! I’ve tried the cleaning strike and honestly it is just easier to do it myself on a regular basis and make hubs do all the outside chores.
(Speaking from experience…)