On birth partner(s): who will be in the room with you?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
  • poll: Who is/was your birth partner, did you have more than one, and were you happy with your decision?
    Baby's father : (123 votes)
    55 %
    Friend : (3 votes)
    1 %
    Family member(s) : (28 votes)
    13 %
    Sibling : (8 votes)
    4 %
    Other : (3 votes)
    1 %
    Nobody : (2 votes)
    1 %
    One birth partner : (29 votes)
    13 %
    More than one birth partner : (11 votes)
    5 %
    I was happy with who was in the room with me : (16 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4513 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    When the time comes I want it to be just my FI and I. I’m very close to my mom, but she does stress me out a little and I don’t think its necessary for her to be in the room.

    Post # 4
    Member
    664 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    We’re not even calling our families until the little one is in our arms. I don’t want people pestering us while I labour.

    Post # 5
    Member
    655 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @bunnymama:  I think that will be our plan as well – once we decide to have kids that is.  The thought of his parents barging in gives me anxiety already.  

    Post # 6
    Member
    1097 posts
    Bumble bee

    Definately DH. I really think i’m going to want my mom in there too – she is my best friend and I think it will be helpful to have some support from someone who’s been there.

    Post # 7
    Member
    5421 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2014

    @UK Bride:  No children here (CBC), but if I had a child the only person I’d want there would be OH. I’m not a prude, but I really would not be at all comfortable with anyone else being there, even my mum who I’m very close to. I’m quite private with things like that (I even got freaked out by the prospect of being on a ward after my lap, and they gave me a private room).

    I think I’d also be funny about people visiting straight after the birth: I’d be OK with my family and best friends, but not OH’s family and friends.

    But obviously this is hypothetical lol.

    I do think though it’s very personal and that the woman should make whatever choice is right for her, and not consider anyone else. The same goes for visits after the birth IMPO. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    6000 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I think it will just be me and my husband in the room. I don’t mind of my mom’s at the hospital, but not in my room the whole time. I would like her to be there because she’s a nurse practitioner so if I want a second opinion on anything from someone who’s not associated with the hospital (I’m super paranoid the staff will tell me something is wrong just to hurry up my labor – like try to give me Pitocin or a C-section when it’s not medically needed)

    Post # 9
    Member
    748 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    When my Daughter was born, it was just my husband and me at the hospital. My parents arrived a few minutes after the baby was born. No one else even being at the hospital was mostly due to the fact that she came much quicker than we thought she would and it was the middle of the night (she was born at 1:57 AM) so we didn’t want to call and wake anyone without knowing that she was absolutely going to arrive very soon. However, I had planned all along on only having my husband in the room with me while she was being born as he’s much better at calming me down than anyone else I know. 🙂

    Post # 10
    Member
    2578 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    My Mum, middle sister and my DH (BF at the time) were in the room with me. DH had just worked a double shift and drove 3 hours to get there, so he nodded off quite a bit until things really started progressing. It helped to have my Mum kind of step n. My sister, well, her school was right next to the hospital, so she ended up leaving early to be there with me, too.

    Post # 11
    Member
    259 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @UK Bride:  I am only having my husband. I’m very close with my Mum, but don’t think it’s necessary having her there too. For me personally, it’s something I want to be just for us (besides all the medical staff of course).

    Post # 12
    Member
    2466 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    My husband.  I’m sure our families will be on the other side of the door.  I just can’t really picture having everyone in the room….at this moment in time.  I’m not expecting and I dunno if my opinion will change when I am.  I think it’d be nice to have a few moments just with my husband and our new little family

    Post # 13
    Member
    1463 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    In addition to husband, my mom was there and very supportive.  My mother-in-law was also present (we got along great), but I think she was kind of scared so was really quiet and didn’t really help. 

    Edited to add:  I forgot my auntie was also there for a bit, helping with timing contractions.  I had a long labor so it gave my hubby a break for a bit.

     

    Post # 14
    Member
    228 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    It will just be MIL and I. FI can’t handle hospitals at the best of times, let alone all the blood and gore of a delivery :p. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    9412 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    @adoc86:  I could have written exactly what you said. My mom is a friend, but also can be a big source of stress. My sister is neurotic and it would be so awkward to have my brothers. For something this intimate and private, it will just be FI and I.

    Post # 16
    Member
    11668 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    DH and DH only.  I reserve the right to change my mind at any time, but I think it will be best that way. I’m not sure I could deal with my mom in there – she’d be crotch creepin’ and probably saying things like “it’s not that bad, I’ve done it 3 times..” NOT helpful!

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