Post # 1
I’ve got one more invitation wording question for today, and then I promise that’s it! 😛
The breakdown of our wedding costs so far has been my parents VERY generously paying for about 80% of our wedding. This is a substantial cost and I know they are working very hard and have saved a long time to be able to offer this to us. Next, my FI and I have paid probably 18% of the total costs, followed by my FMIL who has offered (but who has not as of yet actually contributed) about 2% of the costs. She is telling us she will contribute to the rehearsal dinner, but that’s a separate issue.
Now I feel like my parents really deserve to be listed ALONE on the host line of the invitation, but considering FMIL has contributed, even in a very small sense (and that’s assuming that she does actually contribute), does she have to be listed as a host too? I’m worried that my parents might feel offended by that. I’d be very happy to list them on the invitation “son of XYZ” but in reality my parents are the ones hosting this event, so personally I don’t know if she belongs on the host line. I love my FMIL and wouldn’t want to hurt or offend her.
Post # 3
We are in the same boat. My parents have paid for almost everything, with FI’s parents paying for the rehearsal dinner and about 1% of the wedding costs. We did list my parents as hosts on the invitation. FI and I both felt like it would be a slap in the face to my parents to make it seem like both sets of parents had contributed equally when that was not the case.
Post # 4
@loveinthelibrary: No, FIs parents do not need to be listed as hosts – they are not hosting. I’m also having similar issues, only my FMIL told me how she expected the invitations to be worded (with both sets of parents on host line). I’ve gotten great feedback, on my post, and am going to go with “son of XYZ” under FI’s name. My parents deserve the honor of hosting, and this way we still acknowledge groom’s parents as who they are at the party: parents of the groom, not hosts. I have a feeling that my FMIL may be extremely upset, but I’m coming around to just giving all parents the recognition they deserve!
Post # 5
In tradition it is the Bride’s Parents technically anyways… and if people are going to get offended about whose name is on a invite?
Post # 6
SO that you dont offend anyone, I would do:
Mr. and Mrs ABC cordially invites you to the marraige uniting thier daughter DEF to HIJ son of LMN.
That way its clear your parents are hosting and you are also acknowledging his parents.