- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
I only have one Bridesmaid or Best Man that lives close to me and is a day-to-day friend, and she’s almost like family at this point. She regularly says I’m her best friend, and that I’ve always been there for her like no one else. Besides the fact that she gets mad at me constantly for little things, this is how she’s contributed since my engagement:
-She said she was going to throw us an engagement party at her house, and then didn’t.
-She got really mad at me for not going out with her any more, and the long email explaining what a bad friend I was included this gem – “don’t even mention that you have to save for your wedding, I GET IT ALREADY!” (obviously she didn’t, lol).
-She said she couldn’t come dress-shopping with me on a Sunday at 2 pm because she had a birthday party the night before, and needed the day to rest. When I finally convinced her to come (lots of tearful texting) she was 30 minutes late and I had to spend a lot of time texting, and then helping her find the place (while I was in dresses), since apparently she can’t enter an address into her iPhone.
-She’s given the following advice “I don’t think you should do electronic invites”, “everyone will look bad in mint green” and “negative on the online dress, I don’t trust it” (this is a dress I spent hours designing with a Seattle designer I love).
-I responded very nicely to the first two pieces of advice, but I replied to the last text about my dress that “it’s really not your choice to make” (I was very hurt, but trying not to be mean). She said she didn’t mean it that way, and I said “no biggie”. She then proceeded to give me the silent treatment for two days because she was so offended by my text.
Do you think she’s been egregious as a Bridesmaid or Best Man, or am I just bride-sensitive? Is there any way to explain why her advice rubs me wrong, without sounding like I want her to be on eggshells around me? How can I get her to understand what I need from her, without being too bossy/demanding? She’s never been a Bridesmaid or Best Man before, but she’s my closest friend, and the only one living nearby, so I do REALLY need her. Any advice you guys have would be greatly appreciated.