(Closed) Opinionated bridesmaid…

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think your feelings are justified. Wedding planning is stressful enough without people picking at you – especially people in your wedding party, who are supposed to be on your team!! I can see why you’d be hurt by that. When you have the idea of what you want for your dream wedding, it’s upsetting to have people try to burst your bubble.

Post # 4
Member
8697 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it wouldn’t bother me. But that doesnt mean it cant bother you. Why don’t you just tell her that some of her opinions are 1. annoying and 2. unnecessary?

Post # 5
Member
9057 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I appreciate a friend who’s willing to actually question me to make sure I’m making the best decisions, rather than just blowing smoke up my ass as much as the next guy, but it does sound like she’s just trying to be a know-it-all.  Could it be that she’s upset that you designated two people to be the MOH and her to be their minion and she’s compensating by wanting to be the one who helps you make things perfect/inexpensive the most?

Post # 6
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

To me it sounds like jealousy. Was she able to afford as much as you for her wedding?

Post # 7
Member
1805 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@MissJuicy:  +1

As I read this I thought: jealous! You don’t need a fancy venue, 2 videographers, make up artist? Could it be she didn’t get these things and doesn’t want your wedding to be better than hers? Just say, ya know wedding stuff is stressful so I need all the support I can get from my girls! 

Post # 8
Member
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I don’t know OP, she might just be trying to look out for you.  It might be in an annoying way, but I wouldn’t say she’s being jealous or mean. Maybe talk to her that you appreciate her input and concern but you’ve got the financials all figured out and a budget for everything.

I am wondering though, do you complain about money?  Maybe not wedding related, but over all?   I have a friend who will one day tell me how much in debt he is, how he’s trying find a second job, yadda yadda yadda, then the next day tell me how he’s planning a trip to Vegas and looking at getting a new, fancy camera and keyboard.  I react almost exactly how your friend has been behaving – though minus calling you a “bridezilla.” I will tell my friend that I don’t think he’s being very responsible though.

Post # 9
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would be annoyed, but I don’t think she is coming from a mean-spirited place.  She spent money differently for wedding (whether by choice or by necessity) and she is trying to push her experiences off on you. 

Is there a way you can channel her desire to help you save money?  Is there an area of your wedding that you are hoping to get away with spending less on, whether it’s invitations, centerpieces, favors etc? If so, I would really hit her up for advice about that area.  Then maybe she will not be so opinionated about the other parts of the wedding. 

Post # 10
Member
7653 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I am thinking it might be jealousy or she may just be curious and questioning you, but kind of coming off as strong. Your feelings are justified, and I would stay away from any wedding talk unless she asks (in which case give her minimal details) except for bits that pertain to her part in the wedding.

Post # 16
Member
2269 posts
Buzzing bee

@MrsRichard:  “As I read this I thought: jealous! You don’t need a fancy venue, 2 videographers, make up artist? Could it be she didn’t get these things and doesn’t want your wedding to be better than hers?

+1.

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