Post # 1
So I need your opinions and advice bees! My very best friend just found out that she’s expecting! Here’s a little background….this is her 3rd baby, she has 2 boys already from 2 previous marriages and the youngest is 5 so she doesn’t have any baby stuff anymore. I am really wanting to throw a baby sprinkle (as opposed to shower) for her so she can at least be set up with the essentials and to just celebrate baby! Her mother isn’t exactly all that supportive when it comes to decisions she makes so I don’t see anything coming from that side. Here is my question, because she won’t be registering for this baby, when I send out invites to her sprinkle how do I word that on the invite? There is usually registry info in the invite so what do I put in place of that? And i understand that a lot you will assume I’m trying to be gift grabby for her but the whole point is to shower (or sprinkle) mom and baby with love and to set them up with baby stuff and its exepcted in my area that you bring gifts to a shower. With that said, how do you think I should word the invite??
Any suggestions would be great!
Post # 2
Since this is not her first child, it is considered tacky to throw a shower per se. However, there is nothing wrong with wanting to celebrate your friend and her pregnancy — as long as it’s understood that gifts are not necessary. Do not include a registry or anything that would indicate that a gift is expected. Just have a nice get together in celebration of the new baby — if people want to bring a gift, they will do so…
“Join us in celebration for the birth of… ” and you can say that cake and/or hors d’oeuvres will be served.
Post # 3
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
I’m in a very similar situation, and am throwing my friend a tea party to celebrate baby boy #3. The invites will say something to the effect of “Please joins us for a tea party in honor of Mrs. Blue and Baby Boy Blue, August xx, 2014 at 2:00pm. Address info. RSVP info.” No mention of a “sprinkle”, gift registry, etc. If people ask when RSVPing, I will gladly tell them where my friend is registered. If they don’t ask, that’s okay too.
Post # 4
I would suggest rethinking the baby sprinkle. They are so tacky. if you want to sprinkle her with love, just have a nice brunch!!
Post # 5
I do not think a registry is appropriate for a third child, nor is a “sprinkle.”
Post # 6
I threw my friend a brunch for her second baby. I dint call it a shower or sprinkle but rather a” celebrate the arrival of baby X brunch”. I kept it casual and sent out an email as opposed to paper invites. I did not include any gift info n the email, but almost everyone asked me if she was registered anywhere. She did have a very small registry set up, so I ended up emailing the group with the info but requested that gifts not be brought to the brunch so that everyone didn’t feel obligated to bring something. I found that close friends want to get gifts, no matter what number baby it is.
Post # 7
SkinnyLatte17: If I was invited to the sprinkle (and got no registry info) I’d probably just include a gift card to Target or Babies R Us in a nice card. When people call to RSVP and ask about gifts you could always say that gifts/gift cards are appreciated but not expected.
Post # 8
I’m not into the sprinkles thing. I think it’s weird when you already have younger children. I think if you have a kid over 10 or so I could see how it might be ok then.
Post # 9
I don’t think she should have a gift registry, and I would not put any information about gifts on an invite- tacky. You can absolutely have an informal celebration of a new baby and shower them with love. If people want to bring gifts, (and some will no matter what) then they will. I like PP’s idea of throwing a brunch. If people do bring gifts, I wouldn’t open them in front of everyone- that’s a shower thing.
Post # 10
I think a new life should be celebrated no matter what, and if you want to throw her a sprinkle, throw her a darn sprinkle! I’m all for etiquette but this is one thing that drives me nuts. If someone wants to be offended or give a side eye then they can, but She’s not throwing the party for herself or doing a huge registry. It’s a party for goodness sake!
anyway, off my soap box. If this were me, I’d send out the invites and just say something like “you are invited to celebrate the birth of…” And not mention anything at all about gifts or registries. If someone DOES ask you and insists on getting something, you can suggest a gift card or diapers or something along the lines of “basic, small things a baby would need daily” (if they truly want to bring a gift).
Post # 11
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Don’t you love how no one actually read’s OP’s post that states she is NOT having a registry for her friend?
Post # 12
- Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand
Equine_Breeder: this exactly.
I also agree with PPs that most who want to give gifts will likely bring giftcards. will she be finding out the sex of the baby? I feel when people aren’t given a registry to choose from, they like to know the sex in order to buy “gender specific” gifts.
Post # 13
SkinnyLatte17: I think its fine to invite people without mentioning gifts because they WILL inquire about what to get her if they are planning on gifting. I think of it like a wedding…. if someone is planning on attending an event that is “normally” a gift giving scenario…. they either WILL or WONT buy a gift period….its not like having a registry or hint of gift giving is going to change their minds like “OH I had no idea I was supposed to bring something? lol”. Pretty sure everyone will “know” whether they choose to acknowledge it or not 😉 unless they are like… the densest person on the planet.
People know these are gift giving events and if they personally feel like “she has 2 kids already so I’ll attend but Im not buying anything”, having gift hints/ info on the invote wont change that….and the same for people who will want to give (they will just contact you for the info), so I see no issue with throwing her a celebration. I know shes not having a registry per say but when people contact you, you can just tell them that flat out but just say because her other kids are not babies anymore shes gottin rid of a lot of basic needs stuff ….maybe have a few things on a list you know she needs and can tell them.
I agree with pp who said every baby deserves to be celebrated… I dont think the crazy extent of a first shower is needed when ppl have babies close together but that doesnt mean you dont need things/new new things because stuff breaks/gets ruined etc. What about people who have a boy …and they get all boy stuff at a shower then have a girl??
Post # 14
- Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.
shanbp: Agreed 100%. A party to me like that = gift. A card with money in the least. My mother has 3 of us 3 1/2-4 years apart. We’re all female, but, technology and safety standards also change. What mom doesn’t a new gadget?
Post # 15
MissFormaldehyde: exactly… I mean car seats are only supposed to be good for like 6 months to a year? or something like that anyways…. things can definatly change in a short time for safety standards and recalls, and lots of stuff gets thrashed!