Options for Harassing Letters? As in snail mail! wtf??

posted 3 years ago in Legal
Post # 3
4441 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@marhealy:  Restraining Order

Post # 4
6812 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Does she know who is sending the letters?

Post # 5
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@marhealy:  I would suspect a neighbor or did she go on a date recently so that it may be from a crazy ex? Contact the local police ASAP and file a report then look into a restraining order.

Post # 6
1234 posts
Bumble bee

Does she know who is sending them? If so, she can probably get a restraining/no-contact order (especially if there has been more than one letter). If not, I’m not sure there is much the police can do besides document it at this stage. However, if it starts coming from Facebook/email, maybe they can trace the email address? I’m not sure what it would take for them to do that or even if the local police have those kind of capabilities. All I can suggest is encourage her to go to the police and at least file a report so there is a paper trail if it escalates.

Post # 7
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’m guessing this person is choosing snail mail so they can avoid being traced.

Harassment by phone, email/internet is too easy.  I would just stop opening the letters.

Post # 8
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I’d go straight to the police and file a report. They will guide you as to how to proceed from there.

I am not trying to make your anxiety worse, but from a safety standpoint you should be aware that this is how some stalkers begin their behavior before it ramps up to something more extreme. Maybe it’s a prankster…but maybe not, and better safe than sorry.

Post # 10
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@marhealy:  What is happening is considered stalking, and so she should report it to the police and bring the letters. I think you are quite right that it could escalate. 

If they can figure out who did it (someone crazy enough to be doing this might have a history and fingerprints on file) she can get a restraining order, plus stalking as a crime if punshiable with fines or jail sentences (albeit it stupidly short ones). 

It it does escalate to internet things, make sure she saves it all and documents in a journal when everything comes in.

Post # 11
4134 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Definitely file a police report. Maybe put some in a baggie and they can fingerprint them. It’s a long shot, but who knows. I would make sure her FB setting are as private as possible. 


Does she have any idea who would be doing it? 

Edit making a police report is also to document what has been happening and for how long in case things escalate. 

Is it possible someone has just randomly gotten her address somewhere and is trying to shame or threaten her into some sort of scam?


Post # 12
293 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Make sure she keeps the letters and the envelopes they came in. Was there a post mark? Return address? (Ok, I doubt the person doing this is that silly, but . . . you never know). She could look into getting her address made unlisted, but until she next moves it would be useless, since the creep has found her. Definitely report it to the police though, so they can just add more to their file if/when things get worse.

Post # 13
1244 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Do they mention her by name? Are they trying to get something from her?

Post # 14
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would definitely make sure they’re all documented with the police. It would be awful if it got worse!

Post # 15
6948 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@marhealy:  Unfortunately if she doesn’t know who they are from there’s not a ton to do at this point. I would file a report with the police, just so there’s a history/record of the harassment should it get worse. That really sucks! 

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