Weddingbee boards

I give FH oral WAY more than he does me.  This is in part I have frequent bleeding due to the IUD (I totally understand when this is going) but he also won't reciprocate unless I am completely shaved- he says hair bothers him too much.  FH likes the completely bare look, and I don't.  Does your SO insist that you are shaved for oral?  Am I unreasonable for being upset?

Edit: FH is moderately hairy and doesn't shave.  He says that because of the differences, he gets more hair in his mouth than I would if we both don't shave. (sorry for tmi)

It is the opposite for me and FI.  He definitely gives WAY more than I do!  I try to keep everything relatively neat and shaved when I can (and I prefer myself clean shaven usually), but that is not always possible.  He has never said anything to me about it though.  He is not exactly meticulously groomed either, so I would be offended if he asked that of me.  I really should give more often, but he usually starts it first and then I get all scatter-brained and a bit "out of it" and by then we usually move on to sex anyways.  I will do better and try to be more of a giver than a taker from now on. 

But still in terms of requesting to be groomed a certain way, well...I would be upset.  I get that we all have our preference, but if that doesn't always happen, it is kind of rude for him to say he won't give you oral just because of that.  It isn't going to kill him to give oral when you are not perfectly shaved sometimes!    

One other question- how would you handle this with your SO? 

Edit: I have shaved everything several times, but I don't like it at all because:

1. I HATE shaving- more than anyone I know, so much that I am getting laser hair removal on my legs and underarms.

2. I don't like the look.

3. When we are intimate, things get really irritated, despite good skin products and not shaving right before.

wow--i am right there with you. i give FI oral way more than he does to me. he really likes it, and sometimes asks me to do it. i totally dont mind! especially if i am on my period or something. but, i wish he would reciprocate more.

i guess the only way that i would handle it is that i way would stay shaved all the time. it's super important to me that my FI is uber attracted to me all the time, to i make a concious effort to cater to his preferences. i usually shave every day or every other day anyways.

Oh man, I give FH way more than he gives me, but unless I'm right out of the shower, I'm a little self-conscious to get serviced (LOL), so I'm ok with the "disparity". I also don't mind doing this for FH at all-- we both like it.

However, since you aren't ok with it, I would explain to your FH your issues with shaving completely bare. I personally can't shave every day because my skin gets very irritated as well. I actually have to let it grow out quite a bit (1-2 weeks) before I can shave again otherwise it will get MORE irritated than usual. Maybe you could actually show your FH what it does to your skin and ask him to shave ALL THE WAY, so he can actually feel the irritation-- maybe that would help him to understand?

But if you want him to acknowledge your issues, you'll have to acknowledge his and try to come up with a compromise. Maybe talk about a compromise-- more groomed while still having some hair out of the way (this might be weird, but you could even do some research/ google some "patterns" and maybe try to agree on one or try some out)? The main thing I think is a compromise, if both of you are willing. If you're not willing to compromise on the shaving, then I guess you know how things are going to be. If he's not willing to compromise, then I'd do like Ribbons said and cut him off. Hopefully he'll come to understand that you're serious and what he's doing is unfair and making you feel badly.