Other persons planning your wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
1888 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  Guess we’re in the same boat.  My FI keeps saying that one of our friends wants to plan our wedding always adding “It’ll be cheap, but I’m not sure you’ll like it.”  Not a glowing endorsement!  My adivce to any comments would be to respond “When we’re engaged then we can discuss the details”.  It sounds like he’s the one putting the cart before the horse.  This will also serve as the reminder that he needs to propose first (believe me some guys don’t get this part).  If there are parts that you like about what they’ve planned let them know, it will really make them feel like you’re part of the family.  If there are some things that are almost, but not quite right, suggest changes in a subtle manner.  If there are things that are just a flat out no, you can tell them thanks but not thanks (use the I really want to be able to contribute some of my person touches to the wedding).  It sounds like you’re going about it totally in the right way.  Just discuss it calmly and things should be alright.  

Can’t wait to see the engagement ring you get!

Post # 5
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  My MIL tried to pull that stuff but I stood my ground. It would have been super tacky if I had let her completely take the reins. 

Post # 6
Member
1888 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  Gotta laugh at that one!  After six months of long-distance dating I asked my FI if we were dating.  His response was “I assumed we were”.  I always have a good laugh at the things guys just ‘assume’.

Post # 7
Member
1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Im getting married in Ireland and in India, and I suspect Im not going to have a huge amount of say in the Indian one. For examplon our venue was booked by a family friend without discussing it with us. My FI (he’s Indian,  I’m Irish) didn’t want another ceremony but to make his dad happy we’re going to do it. His grandmother has plans for the sari and makeup. And I think FFIL will be deciding the guest list and many of the other details. It’s a little frustrating but it has its good sides too – I didn’t know where to start planning for this one. So I’m going to do the Irish wedding the way FI and I want it and I’m going to go with the flow otherwise. 

Post # 9
Member
1040 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  Thats true and I think the Indian wedding will be kinda cool to experience! To be honest it’s probably better to leave the planning to people who know what they’re doing. 

Post # 10
Member
852 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yep, eveyone got super exicted and started suggesting stuff. We asked them polietly to back off so that we could choose what we wanted. With 17 days to go I now wish I had just let them carry on and plan the whole things themselves….I…..need….sleep…..an evening off, and a conversation that does not involve weddings!

Post # 11
Member
6279 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

my mom took over planning. FI and I still have final decision but my mom needs her hands in everything.  she is paying….

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