Post # 1
Unfortunately my FI and I both come from divorced homes. Both of our dads cheated on our moms and neither of us have very good relationships with our dads.
We will probably still invite our dads to the wedding, but we’re both worried because we don’t have relationships with our dad’s sides of the family, so they would be in amongst our mom’s sides of the family and our friends which could make things VERY uncomfortable and awkward for our families and probably the dads too.
Has anyone had to deal with a situation like this? I can’t see who our dads would sit with at the reception (if they even decided to come.)
FI joked that they can sit in the back at the “cheaters” table together. umm awkward..lol
Post # 3
I sort of had the same problem. My DH’s parents are divorced. His mom’s family was at the wedding and she sat at a table with them, but no one on his father’s side was there (he doesn’t have many relatives left anyway). I sat his dad and his dad’s girlfriend with the parents of our best man, who DH always thought of as second parents and then a few other friends from my side of the family that were the same age range. They didn’t all know each other, but they were able to make conversation the entire time.
I would say to let them bring a date, but check with your mom’s to make sure they would be ok with that, just in case they don’t really know anyone other than you and your FI. We checked with DH’s mom before inviting his dad’s girlfriend to make sure that she wouldn’t be too uncomfortable.
Post # 4
@Ryansgirl: Then sit your dads together at one table and your moms together at another. Our parents are divorced too and mine are not friendly, so this is what we are doing. Are you not inviting anyone they know/are close with? My mom isn’t close to her family, so I asked her if there was anyone she’d like me to invite. Same with FI’s dad.
*Their invited guests are in addition to their significant others.
Post # 5
@retsud: Neither of our dads sides of the family will be invited. My dad was adopted, both of his adopted parents have passed, and he doesn’t keep in touch with his adoptive brother. My dad also has a CRAZY gf who will absolutely not be invited due to the fact she has called my moms house to call her a “chink” and call my sister and I “half chinks” and writing me very rude emails to stop contacting my father.
@stellablue5997: That’s a good idea, we could put them with some parents of friends or something.
Post # 6
@Ryansgirl: I was thinking more along the lines of long-time friends. Here’s who all will be sitting at the table with my mom and his dad:
- My mom
- Her date
- Her long-time friend
- Long-time friend’s husband
- FI’s dad
- FI’s stepmom
- His long-time friend
- Long-time friend’s wife
If we do a table with 10, we’ll add a couple mutuel friends of FI and his dad.
EDIT: just saw your cheater’s table comment. not to be bratty, but a lot of people cheat. I’m sure the two of them won’t be the only cheaters in the room. it sounds like you have a lot of resentment about it and there’s other drama. I wouldn’t invite them just because they’re your dads, if don’t think they/you will enjoy it.
Post # 7
@retsud: The cheaters table was just a joke we wouldn’t actually do that. We will only be having 100 guests, so unfortunately there isn’t room for our dad’s friends. Perhaps we will re-think inviting them.