Post # 1
Hi bees, this is my first post, please be nice if I’ve put it in the wrong place 🙂
I am getting married next year and have been searching for a perfect venue to get married in distance wise, price wise and just somewhere that we love.
I found the place today and have asked about availability for next June, July, August and September. We would like to get married on a Saturday as I am a school teacher and cannot take fridays off and my FI finds it very difficult to get holiday from work during school holidays.
The place we have found has one saturday available in June and no more until early Novemeber. This date is great for us the only problem is that it is a week before two of my friends who are getting married and the day after the bride’s hen do (day out with friends)
We are not overly close to these friends, we speak, get on well and are attending their wedding however I am a bit dubious about booking this venue in case it upsets them. I don’t want them to feel as though we are stealing their thunder or undermining their wedding (they have been planning for 8 years!!).
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Should we book this day or wait until 2012? thankyou 🙂
Post # 3
Do the two of you have common friends? If so, you might be making these common friends choose between the two of you. But if you aren’t planning on having a lot of common people coming to both weddings, I don’t really see a problem with it.
Post # 4
We have two guests in common,but it is not a problem for either of them as they live in the area that we re having the wedding and are not bothered by dates. I was just a bit worried that she may think that I was stealing her month or because it is the week before trying to upstage them but thankyou for the reassurance 🙂
Post # 5
Some people believe in the ‘stealing thunder’ thing, I personally don’t. I think that you own the day, but not the entire month of your wedding.
Post # 6
I don’t think it is a big problem, but I think your friend might be a TAD upset, especially since it is right BEFORE their wedding. If you want to avoid this, you could sit down with them, and explain the situation, and ask if they would be OK with it (pointing out that you only have two guests in common, who are OK with it). They will have a hard time saying no, or being upset with you if you ask. HOWEVER, you’d have to be prepared that they COULD say it would bother them, and then you’d have to pick another date or go against their wishes.
Post # 7
That’s what I think, I just get worried when I see some people on here who believe that the month is theirs and that people choose dates to be spiteful or get in the way-I want a summer wedding so that I can have photographs outside, Novemeber is just too cold in England!!
Post # 8
I know that she is the kind of person to get very upset over things that I often consider small which is the only reason that I am worried and I know that they are super organised which is why they have the date they want..I don’t think they would say it was a problem though, they are more the type to be upset behind our backs which I don’t really want, that’s not fun!
I would never choose the date just before them to be harsh and we are looking into some fridays in case there is a possibility of both being off!
thankyou for all hte replies 🙂
Post # 9
So, did you talk to her? How did she take it?
Post # 10
Well, we had to change our date and due to multiple issues the only day available in our new time frame was the day of a girl I work with (and had taken schooling with beforehand). We aren’t super closer and I didn’t expect to be invited to her wedding anyway, but I asked her before choosing the date, and she was fine with it.
On of my BM’s has made her wedding a week after mine. Which made the HM very difficult, as I am also a BM in hers, which is out of the country.
But I mean, I would ask your friend and see what she says. Then consider how this will affect your HM. Then you should be okay 🙂
Post # 11
If you think she may be a little upset – she probably will be. While it’s true that people get a day, not a month, I can’t help but think I would be disappointed if I were her – wouldn’t you?
Also, I’d be concerned about your friends being hungover at your wedding if it’s after her hens night.
I’d be inclined to choose another date.