- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014 - Merritt Winery
I have been a long time lurker on this amazing site. I have read a lot of your stories and seen probably ALL of your beautiful rings. I feel like I should share a bit of myself with you all. Well beautiful bees and bees-in-waiting, as I sit reflecting on how I will be married in less than three months to one amazing man; I can’t help but try to analyze why I am freaking out so much! I realize that even though this ia a BIG day, it will not be the biggest in our lives. We will have a lot of milestones in our time together. I guess I will start a little before the beginning…
I was single after ending a seven year relationship. That relationship was verbally and emotionally abusive. I believed a lot of negative things about myself. Those negative thoughts stuck around and show themselves from time to time even now. I decided to give an online dating site a try. I’m not sure if I am allowed to say the site but it starts with an “M.” I met a few guys, but none of them worked out. I decided to give it one more shot. That is when Michael sent me a “wink” through the site. We exchanged extremely LONG emails and hilarious phone calls for a few weeks. We then had our first date. That went very well. The conversation was great and time flew by. A few dates later, we had our first kiss. That was, well, terribly awkward! We made up for it many times over though.
Here comes the sad part of our story, so I will be brief…After a few years together, we discovered we were pregnant with twin girls. My pregnancy was tough. Michael was there for every single appointment. He came up with different ways to make life a little easier. We lost our girls at month five of the pregnancy. The loss was of course devastating. Michael didn’t leave my side during my stay in the hospital. We decided to creamate them and release their ashes in a place that holds very special meaning to us. We made that trip several months later.
Happier part coming, I promise…During that trip, on our first day Michael set a ring box on the dresser in the bedroom of our cabin. After my eyes got big, he said, “It’s not what you think. I just wanted to give you something special while we are here.” It was a delicate rose gold and diamond ring in the shape of a bow. The trip was fun and difficult because of what we had to do. On our second to last night there, after seeing fireworks on a chilly night, Michael suggested that I take a warm shower. After getting my pajamas but before we made s’mores, Michael motioned to the fireplace and asked if I saw what was up there. There, in a cute wooden box with our initials carved into it, was a beautiful rose gold engagement ring. After saying some sweet, romantic things, Michael asked me to be his wife. How could a gal say no!
So, why am I freaking out!? I have a guy who makes my breakfast and lunch every day. He works hard. And, he only really just wants me to be happy. Maybe I’m feeling undeserving. Maybe I am afraid it is all going to go away. Maybe I just need need to get over it and realize that sometimes good things do happen and that’s ok!
Thanks for reading our story!