Post # 1
I mean, we’ve just got to roll with the punches at this point, but we only found out yesterday that he up and quit suddenly last Thursday.
FI and I are both kind of shocked and feel betrayed – a major part of the reason we chose/loved this venue was because the coodinator not only sold it to us but was going to be our day-of maitre’d – he had been there 23 years, was fun but professional, made us feel confident about his work, knew all the resturant members and took time to chat with them, and really had a passion for the place (and for weddings!)
So we’re meeting the new maitre’d – his assistant – for the first time on Thursday to go over the final details for the wedding, which is in three weeks.
I am pretty disappointed, and now I have all these fears about our venue – what if she can’t handle it? What if the wedding is an uncoordinated disaster? What if all the waitstaff quits? What if the cooks quit? What if this new coordinator quits? What if the resturant closes down?
I was going to ask the venue to handle some things for us (setting up our centerpieces – we don’t have a florist) but now I don’t trust them and will assign it to some friends to do (nothing backbreaking: put a lantern on a table and light a candle, done.)
My backup plan if this all (and I mean the whole ceremony/reception) goes completely in the tanker is: cancel the whole damn thing, take the honeymoon anyway, and get married in Hawaii.
It’s hugely comforting to have a backup plan, even if we probably won’t need it.
Meanwhile we’re just moving forward with getting everything we need done, and I am trying to laugh about it (keyword: trying). Our wedding planning ‘journey’ feels like it’s less than lucky sometimes – I suppose that’s FI marrying into my Irish luck, haha!
I did warn him!
CAN I JUST SAY THAT THIS SITUATION BLOWS RIGHT NOW?
BECAUSE IT DOES!!!
Post # 3
@CakeyP: Argh so frustrating! We had a similar situation 3 weeks before our wedding when our coordinator quit and they didn’t even tell us. I only found out because I had called to ask about the seating plan. I was so pissed off and hurt that she didn’t even call us. On the upside, I voiced how upset I was and they ended up upgrading our chairs and linen for us 🙂 Just breathe it’ll all work out but definitely discuss your expecations with the new guy.
Post # 4
Your frustrations are definitely understandable.
Half the reason I chose my venue was the amazing venue coordinator. She’d been in the business for over 20 years, and she knew what she was doing. A few months later I showed up to a meeting, and I was told she was gone. So I met with the new coordinator, and I liked her enough. Then I was emailing that new coordinator a few weeks later and told AGAIN that she was also gone. Talk about rage!
Finally we had coordinator #3 for the remaining time. I had little faith in her at first, but she definitely shined. She was incredible, and she made sure to advocate for me and made sure everything was as smooth as can be.
So defintiely don’t knock the new coordinator until you met the person. He/she could be just as amazing, or even better. But it’s definitely stressful, and I’m sorry for that!
Post # 5
@CakeyP: ugh! I feel your pain. We went through 4 venue coordinators. 4!! It was really ridiculous, and at the time I was very stressed out. Everything turned out fine though, so don’t stress too much. 🙂
Post # 6
@mrsalexander: We’re planning to tell them how disappointed we are, too – it was a HUGE reason we chose this place (because the other coordinators at other places were just shady!)And: BAH! At the VERY least I am going to push for them to include their “mantlepiece candle package” that costs $125 (if they don’t offer us something), so we don’t have to spend the freaking time/money on getting our own stupid candles for it.
I know that sounds snotty of me (oh goodness I never get like that) but honestly I was willing to go with this place because we trusted him, so dagnabbit if I’m not going to try and get something out of this mess!!
@bowsergirl: No knocking! At all! She was his assistant for some time so I at least expect her to know the ropes. I’m not expecting perfection, but if she does an awesome job then she totally earned her commission in my book (because part of the contract was that we pay the maitre’d a 20% commission on the entire cost at the venue – kind of a lot of money to entrust to someone who may or may not know what they’re doing now)
I am just very nervous – sometimes (not always) FI and I are trusing of people to a fault, and when they break our trust we are heartbroken.
It happened more than once with the wedding planning so far! We called them “bad breakups” and we totally acted like that’s what was happening (“oh, we’re going through a bad breakup with this vendor”)
But none of that had happened with this venue, so it’s really a kick in the rear to happen now.
Post # 7
@kcr526: Trying not to stress too much! I promise!
(my wedding dreams are getting weirder though!)
OMG if I went through FOUR coordinators I’d be like “Yessss now I have a legitimate case to push an elopment”
Because there’s a part of me that still wants that itty bitty wedding (and it’s all “I told you so!” right now haha)
Post # 8
@CakeyP: Yeah, I get it. It’s still so nerve wracking to leave your big day in the hands of someone else! Just meet and go over every detail, then let it be. Good luck!