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Ouch! Is the seating a matter of floor space or can the restaurant rent extra tables and seating?
Are you having dancing and have you considered how much extra space the dance floor will take up?
Can you restructure your event to be one really long cocktail hour with active food stations and butlered appetizers? This way you won't need traditional seating, perhaps only seating for 2/3 (depending on guests' ages) as well as some high-top cocktail rounds.
If worse comes to worse, as you suggested seating those not super-close to the family wouldn't be a crime.
christigpa had some great suggestions. Another idea would be to push all the tables out of the way after the seated dinner is over--so those who had to sit in the separate room can feel included during dancing/mingling (if your times/plans allow for any of that, of course!).
Also, at our wedding we had a couple of really unexpected 'no' RSVPs--so even though right now it doesn't look like you'll have space, you might be surprised to find out that you do. Don't worry; it'll all work out in the end :-)
Thanks:) I'm trying to stay positive. We've been planning on having the reception in an alcove-like back section of a small, bustling Korean barbeque restaurant. No dancing, just food. Lots and lots of food. The problem is that the tables have open flame grills, and cannot be moved. You've both given me some ideas though--maybe we can substitute some of the bulky squarish chairs for foldout chairs. Then we might be able to squish some more people into the bigger table, which would normally seat 10. Hm...
If you don't put too much "stuff" on the tables and get small chairs, you should definitely be able to seat 12 people at a table that normally seats 10. Look into chair rentals for sure. Here are some other options that I thought of - not exactly ideal but could possibly free up an entire table for you:
-Place favours & placecards at each guest's seat instead of at a separate table (just display a seating chart at the entrance so that guests will know where to sit)
-Get creative with the cake display. Instead of on a table, could you display it on a counter top somewhere or on the bar?
-What about having just a 1 layer cake for the ceremonial cutting and have the rest as sheet cake or cupcakes in the kitchen that you don't need to display, but that can still be served to guests? Then they could just bring out the cake in time for you and your husband to do the cake cutting, but keep it out of the way otherwise. Then you could seat guests at that one table that is currently reserved for the cake and favours.
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So I just realized that my reception venue only seats 46--and we'll even need one of the small tables for the cake & favors--yet we've managed to invite 68! Definitely wasn't paying attention, but it's too late to back out now, because the STD's were sent months ago, and the people who could have been "cut" have already been repeatedly told that we'd love to have them there. And we would love to have them there--it just might be standing room only in a very busy restaurant! The invitations came in a couple of weeks ago, but we've been waiting to send them until we think of what to do. A couple people have said they won't be able to come already, but FH and I both have small close-knit families and we think that everyone will come.
I know it's rude to uninvite someone (especially if they've already received an STD). The only option now seems to seat those less close to the family in a space that's practically a separate room! is that really the lesser of two evils? What would all the beehivers do? Help!