Post # 1
I have a lot of family in a different country – I sent out 20+ save the dates to other countries as its family and well I guess I was hoping some of them would be able to make it to the wedding. I know that it’s super expensive so I knew that I wouldn’t be getting too many people that would be coming.
As of now I have 5 confirmed and almost everyone else has informed me that they won’t be able to make it. I still send them an invitation regardless, right? or is that being pushy??? International stamps are more than a dollar, so it would be nice if I didn’t have to send the invite since I could save myself some money, but I think it would be rude not to?
Post # 3
Don’t sent. They already declined.
Post # 5
It is still a good idea to send it even though they declined, people may want to send a card or gift even though they can not attend your wedding and they would not have the information to do so if they did not get the invitation.
Post # 6
Yes, still send. STD’s mean an invitation is coming and they might have changed their plans. Even if they still can’t come, its a nice gesture.
Post # 7
@BooRadley: I totally agree.
OP you should definitely still send the formal invites. Also as PP said, your guests may not attend but may still want to send a gift.
Post # 8
You either need to still send invitations or announcments to them.
Post # 9
YUP, ya still send.
Save the Date Cards… ARE NOT Invitations. They are a way of giving someone a heads-up
Truly someone could change their mind in the inbetween time… and now make arrangements to attend.
Like someone else said, some people far away like to have either Invites or Wedding Annoucements (done after the fact) as a souvenier for weddings they aren’t able to attend
Also the whole Invite Package will give them the info they know on where to send any gifts (the return address)… not that gifts are important, but having an Invite in hand, usually is the “prompt” that keys a gift coming to the B&G as well.
Post # 10
@mags2233: im going to send invites to my family up north ; )
the out of the country invites i wouldn’t bother unless there rich lol
Post # 11
If after receiving their Save-The-Date Cards, people had already let me know that they would not be able to attend, I would not send the invite. The invite is because you want people to celebrate with you on your wedding day, so by sending out an invite to people who’ve already told you that unfortunately they wouldn’t be able to attend your wedding seems to me like saying, ‘I know you said you wouldn’t be able to make my wedding, but here is an invite so you can still send us a gift!’
Post # 12
I would say don’t send to those who have already declined. I agree with the previous poster. I declined a distant friend’s save the date but ended up with an invite anyways. Now I’m wondering if she just sent it because she wants a gift…it seems kind of strange since she knows I live overseas and my plans aren’t going to change.
Post # 13
You should still send according to etiquette, but I understand the hesitation. If the invitations aren’t super formal, maybe you can send with a little note inside saying something like “In case your plans have changed” or something?
Post # 14
Our save the date included the link to our wedding website at the bottom. We did this so that our out of town guests could look at the travel & accommodation on the site to reasonably assess whether they could come. It also has the nice benefit of giving them access to our registries and RSVP form. It’s basically like giving them a link to everything that would be on the invite.
Post # 15
I would still send the invite with a little note saying something along the lines of “in case your plans change we would love to have you attend…”. Something that shows that you still want them there but doesn’t come off as gift grabby. I understand why you might be hesitant but like PPs have said, sometimes plans change.