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Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope)

posted 3 years ago in Paper
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    1.
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    Helper bee
    yogigal    June 27, 2009   Chicago (married in Philly)

    I am having trouble finding the answer to this question.

    We are not doing an inner envelope.  How do I address an envelope for a couple that does not live together, but have been together for a few years? I would feel weird putting "jane doe & Guest" when I know the & guest's name!

    Also, is it really rude to put "Mr. & Mrs. John Doe and Family"?  I really want to put and family, I feel like I have read that it is poor etiquette but, they have 5 kids!!! With no inner envelope, I feel I won't have space to list all the kids names.

    Thanks for any feedback.  I wish I could throw this part of etiquette out my office window. 

    Attachments

    1. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img Marissa.jpg (55.8 KB, 49 downloads) 1 year old
    2. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img Marissa_726_.jpg (36 KB, 26 downloads) 1 year old
    3. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img Marisa-Trumpet-726-Ivory-2009-38882.jpg (49.8 KB, 32 downloads) 1 year old
     
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    Honey bee
    Gerbera    August 7, 2010   NY

    Hi,

    I am putting the name of the person I am closer to first and then just putting both their full names. Like Ms. Jane Smith & Mr. John Doe.

    And I am doing "and Family" as well. I think there' something about etiquette when the person is older than 18 they get a seperate invite? And I'm putting the father's name then and family.

     
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    Busy bee
    grumpybear722    January 13, 1992  

    My $.02 is to put Barbie Smith and Ken Black on the outer envelope. We'll be doing the same, so you wouldn't be the only one breaking the "rule". Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Icon Biggrin 

    I'm pretty sure that writing "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe & Family" is ok.

     

     
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    Busy bee
    grumpybear722    January 13, 1992  
     
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    Helper bee
    charmedbride    august 2009   ca/wedding in mi

    I will also be writing them as Mr. John Doe and Miss Jane Black, with the person we know better going first. I also don't think there's anything wrong with the 'and Family' bit, especially if there are so many kids! Frankly, I think unless you know they'll be offended if you don't follow etiquette, they probably won't know any better. I didn't know any of these rules existed until I started wedding planning and I know that my guests could care less, so I'm skipping a lot of the super formal and antiquated traditions =).

    Attachments

    1. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img 3ma3p43lc5Z35Q55W6a5h57436c602e1617e5..jpg (3.8 KB, 39 downloads) 1 year old
     
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    Worker bee
    mv17    May 16, 2009  

    I put both of their names on the outer envelope, but on different lines if they did not live together:

    Mr. John Doe

    Miss Jane Black

    Address

    For a family with 5 kids I think the only practical thing you can do is write "and family"

    Attachments

    1. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img skysamplefront.jpg (16.6 KB, 176 downloads) 1 year old
    2. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img ezefront.jpg (17.7 KB, 105 downloads) 1 year old
    3. Outer Envelope wording for unmarried couples (no inner envelope) :  wedding invites outer envelope Img cosimmasamplefront.jpg (20.5 KB, 111 downloads) 1 year old
     
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    Helper bee
    jma19      

    I second mv17. But I put the parents on the first line and then just the kid's first names on the second line. Just so they knew they were all invited.

     Mr. and Mrs. Jon and Jane Smith

    Kate, Jacob, Max

    123 Main St.

    Anywhere, USA 12345

     

     
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    Helper bee
    sarsk624    9.5.09   Philadelphia

    I have no idea about etiquette on this one but what about The Doe Family?

     
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    Buzzing bee
    mary-alice-me    May 24, 2009   Kentucky

    I did what jma19 did.

    I had a similar question about an engaged couple not living together, so how to invite them together but she's not at his address, and the advice I got was to list them both on the outer envelope. 

    I ended up, at FI's mom's request, sending them separate invitations, which seems weird, especially if they don't arrive at the same time or if the less close person doesn't recognize who we are!

    I think it's SO NICE that you are inviting both people in the couple and including both names on the invitation. That's really etiquette, showing you care about your guests, not worrying about a "rule". 

     
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    Worker bee
    ac-ny    may 23, 2009   nyack

    I addresses mine the following: 

    -Jane and John Smith

    -Jane Smith and John Doe

    -The Smiths

    Jane, John, John Jr. and Janie

    -Jane, John and Janie Smith 

    and in one case:

    -The Smith-Doe Family (husband and wife have different last names)

    Jane, John and Janie 

     

     I did labels that I printed out on my computer. I did not use inner labels. I thought I might have to do two labels for the larger families, but doing smaller fonts I  was able to fit on one label. I used a clear label and the font from my invite. They came out nice. 

     

     

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