Post # 1
Recently at work, I was essentially pressured into taking on a large responsibility for the whole of one month that would require me to stay after work multiple days a week (without pay). After reviewing the things going on in my personal life (wedding planning, moving into my new house, and and personal health), I decided that this new, informal, after-work project was something I couldn’t take on, so I withdrew, explaining that I felt I would not be the best choice to take on the responsibility. The other person seemed disappointed, but found another person to take on the responsibility. I do feel like I’m doing the right thing for me and my fiance (let’s face it, they’re affected by our stress too), but I just wonder if I’m alone in this.
It seems like people don’t think wedding planning is a serious drain on your time. I know you can be as hands off or hands on as you want to be with your wedding, and I’m a go-getter and a doer. I LOVE planning my wedding. Another coworker recently got married and acknowledged that it wasn’t fair to be asked to do this thing.
So… How have you handled things like this while planning your wedding and balancing other home-related responsibilities? What are your experiences?
Post # 2
To be honest, I’d never turn down a big project at work for planning a wedding.
Post # 3
JiminyCricket: But I have a whole house to move me and my fiance into, and have a physical incapability to complete the project. I don’t know if you saw that part?
Post # 4
missanonybee53: I wouldn’t have wanted to take that project either, but I’m not sallaried and you have to pay me to stay late. If my work asked me to stay late and not pay me, I would remind them that DH is an attorney and his firm practices employment law 🙂
I agree with you on work/life balance. You can’t do everything. It maybe allright if you knew you had the free time or the company was paying you for it (extra money to hire someone to do that stuff for you!) As a rule though, even without a wedding, I would need to think twice about projects for work outside of work hours.
Post # 5
I did see it. However, advancing in my career and a strong reputation as a team player is important to me. I wouldn’t let moving stop me from getting some props from the higher-ups at work.
FWIW, I completed grad school, worked full time, AND planned a wedding all at once. It involves time management, not sacrificing your professional reputation and identity.
Post # 6
I’m in the middle of wedding planning and I’m so over people who think it’s such an easy breezy task.
I don’t really have any advice, just letting you know you’re not alone in feeling this way.
Post # 7
- Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard
missanonybee53: yeah, I’m with JiminyCricket on this one.
I’m trying to plan my wedding, work full time, commute an hour each way, cook dinner every night and we have 5 kids combined. I’m squeezing in all the planning whereever I can and doing DIY every spare moment after that.
My career though and proving to them I can still multitask and do it well is important to me because any future advancement will ride on anything thrown my way at work. Your wedding will come and go but how your bosses perceive you for projects, even if not paid for it, and showing them you will go above and beyond your job duties is what will get you further in the company that will only benefit your marriage later on.
I have to agree, yes it is a lot but yes you should have found a way to do it.