Over 18's who live at home – Invite Question

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How should I address the invite?
    They should each get one, sent to their mom's house : (11 votes)
    37 %
    They should be lumped in with their dad : (9 votes)
    30 %
    They can have a joint one sent to their mom's house : (6 votes)
    20 %
    They should each get one sent to their dad's house : (3 votes)
    10 %
    who cares, they won't know the difference : (1 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2642 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Anyone over 18 should get their own invite, so I’d send 2 separate ones.  I’d say you should send it to where they live, but if you think it will create a lot of drama with their mom, then I’d either hand deliver them or send them to your uncle’s house (still separate invites though).

    Post # 5
    Member
    275 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    @MsGinkgo:  def need to give each a separate invite. I’d mail them to the house, if like the PP said, their wont be an issue with the mom giving it to them. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    926 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I lumped everyone in the same household together, no matter their ages or relations.  To me they are invited as a family and can share one invitation.  If they throw a tizzy about it, then that’s just immature.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2419 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    If you think it is going to cause grief when they get wedding invitations sent to their mother’s home then you’d be better of sending them their invitations to their father’s house along with his. All three should have separate invitations though. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee

    If you’re not sure if it would hurt the mother’s feelings, I would send everything to the dad’s house, but invite the cousins individually OR have 3 names on the same invite.

    For my fiancé’s cousin we’ll do so, she’s 15 but we’ll send and invite to ”M.Daddy, Mrs Mommy, and Miss Cousin”. 

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    10748 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I’d just include them with their parents. It is so ridiculous to me to send multiple invites to one house.

    Post # 10
    Member
    85 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I just debated over this exact thing, as my cousin (who is 26) is living at home.  In the end, I decided to send her her own invitation.  The main reason being that I had the extra invitation and I knew it would make her feel nice to get her own.  Had I been short invitations, I would have just included her on my Aunt and Uncle’s invite.  I would send it to whoever’s house they live at.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1640 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013 - Rustic mill, historical site

    @GeorgiaBride5:  

    I did the same, there’s only one family where this applies in my case, their three adult children live at home.   They got one invitation for all of them, and the kids don’t get plus-ones.   I know it’s kind of bad ettiquette, but I really don’t care.

    Post # 12
    Member
    926 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @Purple_Bride:  +1!  Bad etiquette, psh! I never got an invitation to my own brother’s wedding and I was in college, technically living at home I guess, and I was in the wedding.  I think that breaks every single etiquette rule (not like I care).

    Post # 13
    Member
    9092 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    According to etiquette they should each be sent their own invite.

    However… this may be totally sexist of me, but I figured young adult men don’t care that much about wedding invitations so for my 18-21 year old boy cousins that live at home I just added their names to their parents.  But for some of the girls that I thought would get a kick out of receiving their own, I sent them separate.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1640 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013 - Rustic mill, historical site

    @GeorgiaBride5:  

    We never got an invitation to my fh’s brother’s wedding a couple of years ago.   We were not living with our parents, we had our own house, we even had our son.   No invitation.   Some people are oblivious.   (To be fair, we attended the wedding, but did not buy a gift, haha.   His parents bought a large gift and just said it was from the family)

     

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