(Closed) Parents and Tradition

posted 6 years ago in Traditions
Post # 3
35 posts
  • Wedding: October 2012

No garter/bouquet toss – My mom actually tried to have everyone at my bridal shower convince me to do it.  I wasn’t having it and everyone said it was outdated anyway.

No veil – my mom cried when I said I wasn’t doing it. 

Post # 4
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

No Veil- That was a decision I had made from the very beginning- I hate hats, headbands, visors, anything that basically covers my head so I never even gave it a second thought. My mom though had always imagined her little girl walking down the asile in long lacey veil, and even though she didn’t say anything I could see the disappointment in her face when I told her. In the end, she told me she couldn’t have imagined her little girl looking anymore beautiful. 

Both my parents walking me down the aisle- My mom was a little confused at first, but after I explained my reasonging that both of them have helped make me the person I am today – she was super excited to be such an imporant part of the wedding. 

Post # 6
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

We didn’t get married in a church.  *gasp!*

Post # 7
835 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Well, I didn’t have a very traditional wedding to begin with and my parents wanted me to have this huge full blown church wedding and I wasn’t having it! I had a very intimate Destination Wedding in St. Thomas with only 16 people in attendance! Lol!

@chloeburch:  Oh yes, the good old garter/bouquet toss. I didn’t have one either!

Post # 9
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

My parents were easy to handle: they are strict etiquette followers and very formal people, but since they broke nearly every wedding “tradition” in the book for their own nuptials, they didn’t care what we did. The only thing I compromised on was the veil: I hate them, mother wanted to see one, so I wore it for the ceremony and tore it off my head the moment it was over.

My in-laws, however… they were horrified at every “tradition” we broke, but didn’t give a damn about such considerations as manners and the comfort of our guests. A Sunday? A brunch? Both parents walking? First look? Dessert table? Re-arranged order of dances? No wedding party? No garter? No bouquet (let alone toss)? No blessing?

Yep, they hated it. I thought it was silly of them to take such issue with the little details we were/weren’t doing, especially since they completely neglected all kinds of polite, mannerly things.

Post # 10
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Most of our choices were non-traditional, and there was some tough resistence to each choice as we made it, from all sides. The good news is that if you stick to your guns and have the wedding you want, your parents are usually on such a high from seeing you so happy that they get over all the non-traditional stuff. My mother, who at one point was completely horrified at my cocktail party wedding, now consistently describes it as “glorious.” 🙂

Post # 13
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013 - Mansion House at the MD Zoo

My mom is baffled by me wearing a tea-length dress, having a friend officiate, my non-traditional ring. She’s generally just not into the whole wedding planning thing at all. On the other hand, she’s dead set against me changing my name. I give up…. I’m just doing what feels right for us. My parents love Fiance and aren’t attaching strings to the $$ they’re giving us, so at least no major conflicts there. 🙂 My mom has said she wasn’t sure until the day of her wedding if her mom would come because they had lived together before marriage, so at least I know she won’t be so cruel to me.

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