(Closed) Parents divorcing and lots of wedding anxiety

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1691 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Don’t let a divorce sway you from what you want. If you want to marry him, then do it and don’t let your parents divorce stop you from being happy.  Think about all the happy years they did have together, try and focus on what you can do to make your relationship last. Not everyone does stay together, but you can give it your best shot. That’s all anyone can do.

Post # 4
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Why do you have to be present for your parent’s divorce? That doesn’t even make sense and honestly I would refuse to go and tell your father to grow up.

Post # 5
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I am going through something similar right now. My parents are currently in the the middle of a messy divorce, and I totally understand why this may make you feel a little uneasy. 

Although it may be very difficult, try to distance yourself from their divorce proceedings and details as much as possible, and try to remember that not every marriage will end like your parent’s did.

Right now, I am focusing on all of the positive things. Try your best to get excited about ALL of the little details… and try to remind yourself how lucky you are to have found ‘The One’ 🙂

Post # 6
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I’ve been through it, feel free to msg if you want to talk about it to someone who’s been there.

I coped by walking down the aisle on my own, having a “babysitter” for my dad on the wedding  day and a “date” for my mom, and the proposal/engagement/marriage felt great!

Post # 8
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I understand feeling that way. It’s nice that you want to help your mother out like that.

I’m wondering what you meant by he couldn’t do it just this once? Did he not sign the papers after saying he would if you were all there?

Post # 9
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@paloma-aguilar:  *Hugs*

Is it possible that since you’re around weddings all the time, nothing lives up to your expectations? Since you know pretty much everything that’s on trend/in fashion, and you’ve probably seen many beautiful weddings etc. it might be kind of hard to top it?

Parents divorcing is also a huge strain. It happened when I was just a kid, but even for adults it can be difficult.

I think when we proposes you will get a bit more excited.

I guess no matter what, when expectations differ from reality, anxiety is caused. Like if you’ve never been to a place and see it on TV and dream about it, but it’s totally different (even if it’s still good), you’ll feel disappointed.

I also think that wedding planning isn’t rainbows and puppy dogs for ANYONE. It IS stressful. It is expensive. Just because the final result is often glamorous, the process isn’t necessarily easy. If you’re not someone who likes to plan or negotiate, why would it be fun? The way you feel sounds totally normal to me.

I love wedding dress shows like Say Yes to the Dress. I really love anything wedding related. I would never want to have a big wedding myself, though. When it comes down to it, I’d rather elope (and that’s what we’re planning).

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