(Closed) Parents Have Not Really Met

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
7908 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

The rehearsal is sometimes when parents meet. I wouldn’t worry about it.

Post # 4
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Do any of them have anything in common? Maybe you and the moms can have a spa day no one has to discuss any wedding ideas, just relax and get to know each other in a releaxing enviroment. And the dad’s luckily my dad and his dad love the redskins so one sunday I thru a football party, mind you I could care less about football, but my fiance, my dad and his dad had a great time as I ran around refilling up all the snacks and drinks, was tired by the end of the game but it was all worth it when his dad called me and asked when was the next one. 🙂 I hope this helps. Good luck

Post # 5
Member
4609 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

My parents and FH’s parents also never met. I imagine that the rehearsal dinner will be the first time they actually have a conversation, which is more common than I originally thought. 

Post # 7
Member
4525 posts
Honey bee

My mom has met my FMIL and my dad has met my FFIL, but they were brief. If you want some of them to meet, try and get the moms together for something (dress shopping?) and the dads together for something. If not, parents meeting at the rehearsal dinner is pretty common. 

Post # 8
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My parents are separated, so they each hosted a dinner with my FILs. You could have 4 dinners (mom and FMIL, dad and FMIL, mom and FFIL, dad and FFIL). Or you can just let them meet at the rehearsal dinner. I liked being at the first dinner because I could steer the conversation away from bad topics (FFIL and my dad like enemy baseball teams) and towards good ones (they both seemed interested in some philosopher my brother wanted to talk about).

Post # 9
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

My parents won’t be meeting Mr. C’s until a day or two before the wedding because they’re on opposite coasts of the US & Canada.  What I would do is try to come up with any common interests any of the parents have and bring them to their attention ahead of time or bring the topic up when they’re meeting.

For example, my Stepfather and Mr. C’s father were both in the service, both like WW2 stuff, and do woodworking.  Personalitywise, I don’t think they’d ever be BFFs, but there’s a little common groudn for them to limp through the wedding weekend.  Still sorting out about the moms, but I’m sure I’ll find something.

If both couples don’t get along within their relationship, that doesn’t mean the moms and dads won’t be able to bond.  Most parents put on their company manners for the wedding. 

Post # 10
Member
679 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Our parents met the night before the rehearsal.  I felt so awkward leading up to the meeting, but it ended up being a really good meeting.

Post # 11
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Our parents won’t meet until the rehearsal, because my family lives 1000 miles away and has never come visit at a time where we could make everyone’s schedules work. I think you’ll be just fine!

Post # 12
Member
615 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012 - Mother of the Bride's residence

My dad had met my FIL and SMIL briefly, and my mom and FIL met through work one time (a long time ago) but none of my family had met my MIL and my mom hadn’t met my SMIL before the wedding. A few of them met the day before the rehearsal, and the rest of them met at the rehearsal. It wasn’t weird at all!

Post # 13
Member
1828 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Our parents haven’t met and depending on what happens with our DW may never meet. It is what it is and I’m not worried about it. Although I love my in laws I doubt that all of our parents would ever become more than mere acquaintances…they are way too different.

Post # 14
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This is funny to me (not your sitch) but I had a similar sitch. My birth dad is dead/step mom estranged. My stepdad and mom are really awesome fun, drinking, loud, southern folk. FI’s parents are very cold, quiet, sipping their gin folk. I had planned on them …uhm never meeting if possible.

His mom met my stepdad by accident last night and both parties were drunk. It was such a blessing in disguise. I’m going to set up a light dinner and drinking with them now. Who gives an ish- I realized I’d rather get any weird/odd meetings out NOT our wedding weekend. 

Regardless they would’ve been so busy the two days of wedding activities that getting to know each other wouldn’t be a priority so eh, it works out either way.

Post # 15
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Day_In_The_Life:  Eh.  Don’t worry about it.  They are adults and if they want to cultivate a relationship, that’s on them.  If it REALLY means that much to you though, the only thing I can suggest is having them over your house/apartment for lunch/dinner.  And if your parents and his parents don’t get along, do the Mom’s and Dad’s separately.

Post # 16
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

my parents and FI’s parents have never met, and we’ve been together for five years. Neither of our parents have traditional work schedules (my mom is off Monday/Tueday, my dad is off Sunday/Monday, his mom is off Saturdays and Thursday and his dad works all the time), and they live four hours away from each other. FI also isn’t very close to his family, so that doesn’t help the situation. They both have very similar personalities, but not a lot in common.

 

My dad is actually meeting his dad at the Packers/Rams game in a couple weeks for the first time…FI and I are convinced this will be the most awkward meeting ever because both of our dads are super shy.

 

But it’s super common, so NBD.

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