Post # 1
Ok, so our priest said our parents have to call the church prior to our wedding. I forget exactly what he called this, it sounded like a Latin term. Has anyone else had to do this? I asked if it could just be one parent since my dad is not Catholic, and he said no both parents have to call. I was just wondering what the discussion entails???
Also, it seems a little odd. I mean, what if our parents refused? Would we not be permitted to get married in the church??
Post # 3
I’ve never heard of such a thing!
Post # 4
I am catholic and I’ve never heard of this. You and your FI are adults. Exactly what the hell does he want your parents to call and say?
Post # 5
@jennygrl070: Our parents didn’t have to call the priest but they did have to go see him. But only one of each our parents (my mom and his mom) went. He asked them each a series of canned questions such as “Is there any reason why the should not be married?” and “have they been married before?” etc.
I wouldn’t worry too much about it, probably just a formality.
Post # 6
Okay…I think he called it an “appa davis” ??? Does this sound familiar?
Post # 7
hmm… never heard of this.
Both of our parents have to fill out a form saying we haven’t been married, we’re in right state of mind to freely do so, we are both baptized etc.
maybe this is in lieu of a paper form?
Post # 8
My grandparents had to do that, but my Grandma was 16 and my Grandpa was 24!
Post # 9
He prob. meant affidavit which is what our paper form is called.
Post # 10
Sometimes the priest will ask family members how they plan to mentor or support you if you have difficulty in your life, or specifically, in your marriage.
Post # 11
Thank you so much!!!!
I googled affidavit for Catholic wedding and it just says our parents have to state that we are free to marry. It also said it just has to be someone close to you (typically your parents) so that answers my question about what if our parents refused! Lol.
Phew!! Thanks everyone
Post # 12
we never had to do this.
but for some reason our church didn’t have my family registered as regular parishioners and since i was still living at home, one of my parents had to go in and fill out a form just to get us in the system, but that was it. it didn’t have anything to do with giving us “permission” or anything…
Post # 13
Our parents had to fill out a form saying we haven’t been married before and that we are marrying on our own free will.
It basically is just to establish that you have the freedom to marry.
Nothing to worry about.
Post # 14
When I first read the post I thought it had to be to do with being free to marry! The priest wants to know that you have not been married before. This is easy enough for the Catholic partner because their notes will be with the dioscese they were baptised and confirmed in. However, they also want to know that the non-Catholic partner is free to marry. In my case, my father wrote me a signed letter of freedom stating that he was my biological father, and that I had never been previously married, and was free to marry, to the best of his knowledge. This letter could also have come from my mother, but the parish only required information from one parent, not both, in my case.
Post # 15
Yeah my husband had to get 2 affidavits because he lived without his parents for mod than 6 months (not because he isn’t catholic), it was stupid. His parents had to go see a priest and the priest asked them questions, one of them asking if he is impotent. So stupid and awkward. Your priest will decide on their own if they feel you need them or not.
Post # 16
I just talked with my parents about this exact issue. We are getting married in a different state from where they live (And they aren’t Catholic). Our parish requires an interview with the parents and the priest or deacon fills out the form. Apparently, where my parents live, this is not normal. The Catholic churches they called either wouldn’t talk with them or wouldn’t call them back. Luckily, our priest is understanding and they are doing the interviews before our rehearsal. I just find it awful that they churches around them aren’t returning calls. Really? If you don’t want to do it, just say that. My parents are extremely frustrated, as am I.