Parents or family paying…HELP

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MangoLover4Life:  I never brought it up with my parents, I have never and will never ask for money. But if its a normal thing in your area for parents to pay, take them to lunch and just bring up some costs, they may surprise you by jumping out and saying they’ll cover that! My dad actually just brought it up in the middle of a normal phone convo that he was gunna give us 5k (over half our budget!) I was amazed and so grateful – but I wouldve felt terrible f I had ASKED him for any money.

 

You can always try and see 😀

 

EDIT: $500 is a great price! Im paying $12pp (about $800 total) for use of a function centre (gorrrgeous) with just tables, tablecloths, napkins and use of their industrial kitchen.

Post # 4
Member
2883 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 1998

@MangoLover4Life:  sorry but there’s no polite way to ask. If they want to help you out they will offer but for now I wouldn’t count on it. 

Post # 7
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

There’s not a big difference between having someone pay a portion or all of it.  Either way, I think you have to plan to pay the entire thing, and if she offers, that would be very nice of her.  There’s not really a good way to ask. 

Post # 8
Member
1931 posts
Buzzing bee

My parents flat out told me they would never contribute a cent so I guess I totally get to avoid that awkward conversation! 

Post # 11
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MangoLover4Life:  Maybe change the way your looking at it, dont say “I want her to pay for half of it or 1/3 or it” because really its not very fair on her. Really you should never expect for help from anyone, I was simply lucky Im my dads only daughter and because I have never asked him for anything (plus hes a very generous man in general), he was more than happy to help.

My brother actually asked the various relatives who were willing and able, to cover the cost of a single thing as their wedding gift. My mother payed for flowers, my father payed for the venue, my grandfather payed for the food, and her parents payed for the transport and I think her dress. Its not a specific amount, they know what their money goes towards, and they feel better about it on a whole 🙂

Post # 12
Member
1931 posts
Buzzing bee

@MangoLover4Life:  My parents are loaded but I suppose I’m used to that sort of attitude from them. However I’m glad that the second I graduate they can no longer hold my tuition over my head as a way of controlling me. 

Post # 14
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MangoLover4Life:  Your lucky, photography is one of my biggest concerns!! 🙂 Its also a way your not so well off parents could feel like they are really a part of it and are contributing, because its not a specific amount they have to fork out 🙂

Post # 16
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@MangoLover4Life:  Thats an awesome deal if you loved your engagement photos 😀

You can always slice the reception bill up: venue hire, food, bar, rentals if neccessary, decorations, entertainment etc. 🙂

 

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