- 3 years ago
- Wedding: October 2014
I’m turning to the bee, for support I guess….. I don’t know what else to do.
My dad (well stepdad since childhood) has made my mom reach the point of separation. But then, who wouldn’t after what he pulled?
Quick background story, my dad is very verbally abusive towards my mom.always putting her down, calling her names and just being a flat out asshole. At least this has been going on for the last few months which I found out about yesterday.
He went to Spain last week to visit his kids (well, they are in their 20’s so not really kids anymore). He was supposed to be on a plane back today. He treated my mom like a complete ass all week, refusing to talk to her, disappearing for 24hrs at a time, just being shady as all hell. Telling my mom he was packing and heading to the airport yesterday. Well…….he never boarded that plane. He reschedule his flight to next week and led my mom on all week lying pretending he’d be back today only to find out he wasn’t. He drained the bank account and then lied and told us there was a strike in Spain and couldn’t fly back (i checked online, the flight is enroute, 3 hours shy of landing in Los Angeles). He turned his phone off and haven’t heard from him since.
My mother is devastated. I don’t know what to do. She left everything behind in Spain for him. I’m the only thing she has here and in 5 months I’ll be starting my own family as a married woman. My FI is absolutely speechless but then what can the poor guy say or do? She is moving in with us on Sunday till we can figure something out, otherwise she is completely alone.
I am so upset, I don’t even know where to start to process the situation. After what my dad has pulled, that is no father of mine. Now I find myself thinking about my wedding and feeling sorry for myself because I will no longer get walked down the aisle, or get a father daughter dance. I also feel bad for feeling bad about myself because I need to focus on my mom and getting her into safety.
*more background story referring to the safety comment above* My dad is crazy. He will obsess, stalk you, go to your work, my mother is terrified he will threaten her, apparently (I found out about this yesterday) his ex wife has a restraining order against him for this exact same reason. This is more than I can handle.
I don’t know if I’m looking for advice or a slap on the face and a “snap out of it and figure this out” talk. I’m maybe just venting. I feel bad opening up like this to my FI. We just moved into our new home 3 months ago and now he has to face living with his FMIL.
anyway, sorry for the huge vent. I didn’t know what else to do.