Post # 1
Hello bees! This is the first time I’m writing here so let’s see how this goes! Lol ok so basically I wanted to hear what other people had to say. Fiancé and myself both graduated with our bachelors degree in ’11 and are both nurses…we’ve had a stable job since then…fiancé proposed to me (yay! :D) and both of our parents were excited…BUT now our parents are saying how they want us to get a masters degree in nursing before we even get married…we are both in our mid 20s… fiancé and I want and need to get atleast 2 years in our field if interest before we even go back for a masters degree bc we don’t want to just go to school and get a masters degree and then find out or realize we want to go into another area of Nursing Then that degree would be for nothing. I understand our parents want us to get our masters but I don’t understand ywhy they want us to get that before we r married esp when we have to save up for a marriage too…I don’t want to be engaged for like 5 years bc we r saving for the wedding, house and going to school too. AND I also dont want to be in my mid 30s having my first kid… Why can’t they just be happy we actually got our bachelors degree and happy that we r nurses. It’s not like we r bums that don’t work. opinions please! Esp if your a nurse (does a masters degree make all that a difference that we need to get that before ma married)
Post # 3
@FutureMrs_KRC: honestly, I would tell them to mind their own business. It is NOONE else’s business when you choose to get married, (except perhaps if they were financially supporting you etc.) you have both got careers and degrees. I’m sorry, I just don’t get it why they think it’s their business?!
Post # 4
@Emmzy: +1. If you’re in your mid20s, you’re ADULTS. Do what you want.
Post # 5
@FutureMrs_KRC: Does an MD in nursing mean a big pay hike? Or what happens when you get it? The reason I ask is my dad kept pushing me to get an MD in my field and I finally was able to show him that financially it didn’t even make sense. The pay increase was so little that by the time I paid for school and waited two more years to start a job I would have already gotten pay raises to match what you get paid with an MD. Also, MDs in my field tend to lead to research which I don’t want to do. Anways, I’m just curious why they’re pushing so hard for it. Like you said you both have good jobs. I think they are being a little ridiculous and you guys should get married! I don’t see why it makes a difference whether you’re married or not when you go back to school!
Post # 6
Luckily it’s not their call. Do whatever works for you guys. You’re going to deal with so many obnoxious opinions for the rest of your marriage, now is the time to draw boundaries.
Post # 7
@FutureMrs_KRC: I’m going to have to agree with everyone that’s already replied. It’s your decision, not theirs. Have they stated why they want you to get your masters first?
Post # 8
@FutureMrs_KRC: I don’t know of anyone with a master’s in nursing. It sounds like they just want you guys to wait on marriage.
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2012 - Southern California
Honestly, unless they are going to pay for that program, I would politely tell them that you two are both adults & more than capable of making decisions for yourselves :]
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
This is weird. You are fully grownups – your parents need to relax and quit trying to control your lives! Especially if they’re not paying for your wedding, they really have no say.
My FI is a nurse and wants to get his nurse practicioner PhD. We certainly don’t feel the need to wait until after that to get married though. I got my master’s before getting engaged, but that’s only cause we were in noooo rush to get engaged/married.
Post # 11
if they are not financially contributing (to either your living expenses, wedding or masters program) then they have no say
Post # 12
Thanks bees! Yeah idk why they’re acting like that either…my fiancé and myself came to the conclusion that it’s bc were the oldest of each family and that’s y it’s hard to let go? Idk brut they should be happy we both graduated collegfoams r actually doing something with our degrees instead of being bums lol and it’s not like we just met…we have been together for four years…and we’re saving up for the wedding so it’s not like we’re going to get married tomorrow! we both love our parents but there’s just some things that need to be set by my fiancé and myself…
Post # 13
@MrsBeck: not really…mb like $1000 extra at the end of the year and I don’t want to just get my masters for the sake of just getting a masters. I want to make sure that when I get my masters it’s in the area of nursing that I wanna do. I dont want to get a masters in one area then 5 years down the line figure i wanna do a totally different area in nursing..that would be a waste of time and money….And I have to have atleast 2 years of experience before I even get to apply anywhere.
Post # 14
I agree that it’s better to be in your job for awhile before getting your master’s. I know several nurses who were sure what area they wanted to work in, then hated it. They actually ended up working in floors that were very different from where they started.
If your parents are not paying for it, then they really have no say. You’re in your mid-20s, it’s your life. You know what’s best for you!
Post # 15
I don’t see why you can’t go to school while married and get your masters, especially if you are not sure of the particular field in which to get it. Also I think many masters programs are more useful when you have a bit of experience in your field. Is there any impact on your financial aid to being married?
Post # 16
most masters degrees for nursing want you to have a few years experience before applying so you should just do what YOU want to do and wait until you’re sure about what area of nursing you want to be in. Maybe try to have a heart to heart with your family about why you want to wait, plus you are both adults! You can make your own decisions and they’ll just have to accept it!