(Closed) Passion/chemistry in your relationship?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: How important is passion and chemistry to you, and how did it develop between you and your SO?
    We were attracted to each other right away, and still are very much! : (39 votes)
    68 %
    We were attracted to each other right away, and it has faded over time. : (11 votes)
    19 %
    We weren't mutually attracted at first, but it grew over time. : (4 votes)
    7 %
    Passion, chemistry, and physical attraction have always played a minor role in our relationship. : (3 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2015 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    Ha, well, we’re the opposite. I don’t want to say we have no passion at all. When we first met, we liked each other, but it was never a “I have to jump your bones right now” kind of attraction. It grew to that over time, and for about 9-12 months, we were, umm, busy in the bedroom a lot.

    But now, passionate is not a word I would describe our relationship. We’ve been together five and a half years, and we still love having sex with each other (I would hope so!), it’s not the most important thing to us by any means. We have a very, very deep friendship and respect for each other that is always resonating, and that’s the core of our relationship, but we’re perfectly fine not getting hot ‘n heavy all.the.time 🙂

    Post # 5
    Member
    326 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    We were definitely very attracted to each other from the start, and remain very passionate toward each other to this day.  However, like most relationships, the “I need to have you right now” passion has faded into something different…something much more intimate and close.  I like it this way, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything! Like MissChapstick, our deep friendship and respect is the core of our relationship, and we have vowed to never let the “spark” go out, but I think passion is something relative to your relationship that has different definitions over time.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1523 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    The first time I saw FI was in a bar from accross the room. I was sitting with friends and I just remember instantly feeling attracted to him. I HAD to know who that guy was and wanted to talk to him. It was an instant attraction.

    I of course was shy and didn’t talk with him much that night. We ran into each other again several months later at another bar on Cinco De Mayo. Then it was an instant connection again. We talked for 3 hours and shut the bar down. We don’t really remember what we talked about the entire time. He walked me home and kissed me in front of my door. We’ve been together ever since.

    These days, sex doesn’t happen as often as we would like because we are busy young professionals. I know that we are both still very attracted to each other though. I think he’s so handsome and he lets me know that he thinks I am beautiful as well.

    Post # 7
    Member
    724 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    @Miss Chapstick: This totally describes my relationship too! I think my FI is very attractive, wonderful smile and cute and all that. But I don’t want to have sex with him everytime I see him. Sometimes I feel like we’ve been together for a long time, because we’re more playful and romantic than just full on sex crazed teenagers. I suppose that’s a good thing? I don’t know. I think everyone is different in what they are comfortable with and expect in a relationship.

    Post # 8
    Member
    94 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I’d have to say I’m the same as 5292010 and can also relate to Miss Chapstick. FI and I were very um “passionate” when the relationship was still new, we’d have that “I need you right now” situation nearly every time we were together…sometimes we “needed” each other more than once a night! We’ve been together 4 years now, and lived together for almost 2.5, and yes, that “passion” has faded and I’d say we rarely get that “gotta jump your bones” feeling anymore. But I know I still look at him across the room and am struck by how attractive he is, and he makes me feel beautiful too. Sometimes I miss those super passionate times, but whenever FI does something super sweet and special to let me know he loves me, and he’s there for me, and all he wants to do is make me happy, I’m glad we’ve reached the point we have in our relationship!

    Post # 9
    Member
    7779 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I must say, FI and I have somehow managed to keep out passionate side. We had an immediate chemistry and we’ve maintained it throughout the 4 years we’ve been together. Of course, it goes through phases like any normal person. We’ll have months where we aren’t as physical and dont feel like it, but they’ll be followed by months where we’re acting like teenagers in puppy love.

    This is the main perk of the military/LDR. I only see him about 4-5/year and let me tell you what, those times are good. 😉 It makes it very easy to maintain that chemistry.

    Post # 10
    Member
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I feel like our situation is somewhat unusual. We were 11 when we met, and so it wasn’t much of a thought. We barely spoke for two years, then became friends. It was almost immediately after becoming friends that we realized we were attracted to each other. We were young enough, however, that we waited a year before actually having any sort of a date. That feeling of chemistry has never died out over the following 7+ years. I do think the intensity of it has faded, though – there were times when we were certainly hormonal and not prudent. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    2402 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    It was instant attraction for my fiance & I… I HAD to talk to him when I saw him. After being together for almost 5 years now and being comfortable with each other, the passion isn’t as intense as it once was, but we are still very attracted to each other.

    Post # 12
    Member
    2704 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    it was definitely instant attraction when we first met… dating years were full of passion… these days i think both of us are exhausted from our work/school/wedding planning schedules that we don’t have the energy to act on the passion we do feel. 😛

    it’s comforting and works for us… we’ve surpassed a level of mere physical attraction, but when we can find the time, it’s just like the times where we couldn’t keep our hands off of each other! 😉

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