Post # 1
So, Fiance and i were in the process of moving and getting situated in our new city when we decided to have a friend of fi’s family marry us. He is a pastor for years and has known fi since he was little. The problem is, once we got settled we decided to join a church in our new hometown. The church is very small and we took many membership classes there and got to know our pastor very well. He’s great! Fi and i thought about having our pastor marry us, but decided to stick with the arrangements that we made prior to everything. (which our pastor is aware that we had already pre-arranged someone else to marry us). Well this past Sunday after service, pastor decided to ask us about our wedding date etc. My question is do we invite him to the wedding, even though he is not the officient? If we do i had thought about having him do the dinner prayer, to atleast honor him. I don’t want him to feel obligated or hurt though in the process… I always try to make everyone happy, what is the right thing to do in this situation? Or am i worried about nothing?
Post # 3
I think you are worrying about it too much! Your new pastor (if you chose to invite him) would be happy to attend. And, having pastors as friends, will probably be excited to enjoy a wedding where he doesn’t have to work!
You shouldn’t feel obligated to invite him, however, just because he is your pastor – but, since it sounds like you guys have become friends, it seems fitting you would invite him.
I love the idea of asking him to do a prayer before dinner and I’m sure he would find it an honor. But, even if you didn’t – I think the honor is in being invited to such a special event.
Hope that helps!
Post # 5
I think you’re worried for absolutely no reason at all =). He knew you had prior arrangements (and people who move often times have a childhood/home pastor/friend marry them rather than their current pastor). Invite him as a guest, don’t’ worry about the dinner prayer, just have your officiant do that. I highly doubt your current pastor is going to feel slighted. Good luck!
Post # 6
Yes, most of my pastor friends are relieved to NOT be the one officiating at a wedding:-)
Post # 7
Invite him! He wont be offended.