- 7 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
Once a cheater, always a cheater…
I have to say, I am one of those people who think this statement is false. Other than my Fiance, and one other l(ong distance) relationship, I haven’t been very faithful. I totally believe in Karma! I have never cheated on my Fiance. I could never do that to him. I think it would just crush me to hurt him that way. He is such a wonderful man, I never want him to feel any kind of pain.
I can be jealous and short tempered sometimes. I have been trying to be better about everything. He doesn’t ever even really get mad at me, unless I’m being a b*itch. I complain about certain things, even though he does a lot for me. He isn’t perfect, there have been things he has lied about. (STUPID things) Really stupid.. Just because he thought I would get upset. So dumb.. anyway sorry..
Sometimes I just worry about my karma. I feel since I have cheated, when I find someone I would never cheat on, he will cheat on me. Yeah, I’m crazy I know.
I don’t know if it’s just because I’m getting older and I notice more things, but what happened to this world? Everything is sex. Everything. No wonder everyone is cheating, and getting pregnant at 14.
When I talk to my friends (the ones who live on the mainland), they are all talking about their relationships. Awful! I love my friends, but it’s awful! A straight man (married with kids having an affair with another man (my friend)… One guy cheating on his girlfriend (4 years) with another girl (my friend). My other friend’s boyfriend is doing messed up things and not only is she crazy and checking everything, she is talking to guys and messing around on him, but getting mad? And even they just broke up (after 7 months!!) they are moving in with each other. WTF?!
Even though a couple of my friends aren’t cheating, they are just as bad for being the other person. What happened to this world today? I know some people are like.. “my SO would never cheat!”, but how do we really know? Some people are so good, and it goes on for years!
My friends grandparents divorced after 50 years! The last 25 he was having an affair. After 4 years of being with my ex, he left me for a stripper.
My Fiance has never done anything to make me feel he would even consider cheating, but I have this fear of being left or cheated on later down the road. What if he gets bored?
I feel like I’m living in the wrong time. There was a time when you were noticed for cheating, I thought? Now it’s normal. Cheating, divorce, polygamy..
I am not religious. I am a good person. I still (and always will) make mistakes. But none that will hurt people. Maybe I just see too much bad in the world. People abusing and killing their own family. Everything is awful to me. And, I guess, when my friends are telling me stories, I really have no hope for this world.
I really don’t want to worry about this the rest of my life, or end up alone because I can’t deal with it.
Do you think every relationship has some kind of cheating? Doing something behind someone’s back that would hurt them.. kissing someone, maybe no touching, but the emotional affair.
Sorry for going on. I am just in love with my Fiance and don’t think it’s fair I take things out on him for what I have done, or what other people do.
This world has me nervous.
Do you think that’s crazy?