People asking for invites and plus 1s.

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I just tell people we would love for them to come but our venue is small and we have large families. If they keep asking I just ignore them or change the subject. We’re already inviting 350 people and if they didn’t make the first cut we’re probably not thattt good of friends. We’re doing an A and B list though so if we get enough declines we can invite more people. We’re giving everyone a plus one that is in a relationship at the time we send out invites. 


Post # 4
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@busybeebee:  Reply that you’re so honored that they want to celebrate with you, but that you’ve already set your guest list, and need to stick with it so that you can afford it/stay within the venue occupancy/etc. 

Or say something like, “In a dream world, we’d be able to celebrate with everyone we know and love, but practically, we have to stay within our guest limit. I’m sure you understand.”

Post # 5
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

Edited: At first I swear I read your wedding date as 2015! But now I see it’s 2014! A week after mine.

My guest list is done and invites are sent. I would tell people you’re sorry but the guest list is done. I’d love to invite everyone but you just can’t do it. More people are understanding when they’ve already gone through their own wedding.

We had a lot of people ask for invites early on…most are no longer in our lives or are the new BF’s etc of guests who have now broken up…so I’m glad I didn’t invite them.

Post # 6
6048 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Just be honest, there isn’t the room for everyone (especially you co-worker who can’t pronounce my name).  The only problem I see is if your Dad is contributing to the wedding, you may wind up with a few of StepMother’s family there.   

Post # 7
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I don’t have any advice, but what I really wanted was to ask you was…

Can I have an invite to your wedding?

😛 (jut kidding!)

Post # 10
2254 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m having the same issue girl…. my hairdresser is asking for an invite (HUH?) she’s not even doing my hair for the big day! (Updos aren’t her forte)
I have coworkers asking too that I never even considered inviting.

So what I do is, I laugh it off, oh yeah yeah haha haven’t started working on the guest list yet haha uhhhuuu yeah haha automatically followed by a complete change of subject.

Once everything is said and done, if they ask again, I’ll tell them I’m at max capacity, we have a huge family, I really wish you guys could be there.

Problem solved!!!! 😀

Good luck with that….. and you invite who you want!!! None of this friends of friends of cousin’s friends friends. 😀 

Post # 12
906 posts
Busy bee

does this friend who wants to bring the bf live with him? 

Post # 14
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@busybeebee:  I really question people who ask to be invited to a wedding? I would NEVER ask to be invited to a wedding! 

Post # 15
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Catholic Church Ceremony & Restaurant/Bed & Breakfast Reception

My FI and I struggled a lot with this. A perk is we’re having a semi-destination wedding: it’s almost perfectly in the center of a triangle between where we live, where I grew up, and where he grew up. We also invited people who we talk to about the relationship or know of us well- or respectively we were close to in the past and keep up some type of real relationship with – even if it’s only seeing that person once a year. Everyone else? Nope. Nadda. Even coworkers or quasi friends in our social group- if they don’t know much about our relationship or we don’t hang out on a regular basis, we let them know it’s limited to those people who have walked with us through this time of our life together. 🙂

Post # 16
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Just tell them that due to budgeting you’re keeping the wedding an intimate family affair, but if anything changes and you’re able to invite more people that you will let them know.

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