Post # 1
People who had weddings with 200+ guests, how did you end up with so many? Do you have a huge extended family? A ton of friends? Did your parents invite a lot of people?
I have what I consider to be a pretty large family, so does he, and we both have what I think are average amounts of friends. We’re having ~150. I’m curious how people end up with 200+!
Post # 2
Well large weddings a lot of times are cultural and invite all close and distant relatives and most people from your (cultural) community. Around here, an Indian wedding with less than 400 people would be considered “small”.
Post # 3
I have a lot of extended family on both sides of my family, second cousins I see regularly, etc. so my side of the family alone is 125, although we’re only expecting about 80 of those to be able to come since all live in different cities from where the wedding is taking place. My friends, including their SOs and + 1s, are about 50 and then we have about the same number of family friends, expect about 75% of them to come. So that’s roughly 150 expected guests just from my side! My FI has a smaller family (about 20 including grandmothers, aunts + uncles, and siblings/stepsiblings and their families) but is inviting about the same # of friends + family friends as I am. But since about 80% of the guest list is from out of town we’re only expecting maybe 200-225.
Post # 4
chocochai : Agree that it’s very cultural as well. I was watching an episode of Four Weddings the other day (I know, I know, it’s such a ridiculous show) and there was an Ethiopian bride who had a “small” wedding compared to most Ethiopian weddings- 800 guests!
Post # 5
We are inviting 409 and I totally wish we “could” invite less! I love every single person invited, but I just feel like that is overkill even though there really isn’t anyone we can or want to cut. We both have very large families, we have HUGE friend groups, and a lot of our guests have their own large families (we briefly considered cutting kids–this would cut 90 from our head count–but decided it wasn’t worth it to upset some people, plus we love kids!). In our case, we could have done a very small intimate wedding, but we would’ve had to be brutal when it came to the guest list (immediate family would’ve been 50+ guests) and that just isn’t our style.
We didn’t give our parents many invites for their friends, we came up with the 409 on our own.
Post # 6
brucebogtrotter : Maybe its a regional thing well? We are inviting 190 people and allllll my friends keep asking why we are having a small wedding
Post # 7
right now our guest list is hovering around 200. Both my FH and I have large extended families, plus if we weren’t to invite somebody in said extended family, it would cause a fight…and then we both have a bunch of friends that we are close to, so it just balooned. I think it definitely has to do with families as well as culture.
Post # 8
We have a lot of friends and family. I cut almost my mom’s entire side and we still have 215.
Post # 9
I’ve got a really big family. My fiance’s family isn’t big, but there are a ton of family friends that are basically family.
My original woo-hoo budget free list included second cousins, the extended family I could name off the top of my head, and ALL the kids, and put us just over 300. When we asked our parents who else they’d add in a perfect, budget free world, they put us at about 325. When we added “Oh it would be so nice to see that-friend-from-that-thing” we were at around 340.
We restricted things WAY down, and we wound up sending invitations to 193. When I told my cousins, the response was “What?? So small!!!!”
Post # 10
We both have huge families! Just my mother’s side of my family was 100 invites! Of course, not everybody came, but we had to send invites so feelings were not hurt! And then we had friends on top of that.
Post # 11
I don’t consider my family or my fiance’s family to be huge by any means, and yet we’re inviting 290 and expecting about 230. And that’s without inviting anyone’s kids! But, almost everyone is getting a date, and those numbers stack up fast. When people ask about the wedding size, the usual reaction is “wow, that’s a lot,” and yet it’s certainly not unheard of in NY where we live.
Post # 12
Were at 300 but I’m sure it will increase. We both have very very large families and my mom said it would be rude to not invite all of the kids lol On top of that we come from a culture that’s pretty open invite-ish when it comes to weddings so our parents have pretty large guest lists.
Post # 13
Large family here…about 100 just on my side…add in friends and family friends…plus we hired a 18-piece jazz band, that didn’t help matters. Haha. Ended up with around 210 who showed up.
Post # 14
We went from 300 to 250-60ish and thats because we aren’t inviting most kids now (besides the ones in the wedding or live out of state and can’t not bring their kids).. we also knocked off a few friends that weren’t HAD TO HAVE.. but roughly 150 is family and extended family, and the rest are friends and family friends… the gueslist by far has been the most challenging and dealing with dress regret every once in a while 😫
Post # 15
I sent out 250 invitations and I think my final number was 220 who actually came. My husband doesn’t come from a large family as his dad is an only child. My family however, both my mom and dad have multiple siblings that all have children. We also have a fair amount of family friends because of all the sports me and my siblings did growing up as well as neighborhood friends my parents are close too. My husband’s parents also wanted to invite a fair amount of family friends. My husband and I were also in a fraternity and sorority in college so we have a larger group of college friends that we had to narrow down as well. We were also 24 and 26 when we got married so we are still pretty close to a larger group of college friends than i’m sure we will be 5 years from now.