Post # 1
Has anyone ever cheated on their husband and didnt regret it? Or anyone seriously thought about doing it? I know someone who is having some serious issues with this right now and all she can tell me is shes real confused, she dont get the attention she needs from her husband and shes met a guy who gives her that attention now…so what would you do? she said shes told her husband she wasnt happy and things needed to change several times but they still stay the same,. any advice?
Post # 3
Wow. Are they recently married or been married for a long time?
Post # 4
Nope. Not even if I “wanted” to–I owe him a chance to change things, to work things out and a real separation at least if those things didn’t work out before I ever took a step towards “cheating.” Those vows are important to me and to him.
Post # 5
recently married but have been together for a couple years,
Post # 6
I haven’t. I think that there are periods of time in every relationship, however, where you feel more alone than part of a couple. What you do in that time is what shows how much you value working to continue your relationship.
If she doesn’t get the attention she wants, she needs to confront him until he listens. If they don’t fix the problem with their marriage, or part ways, she’s going to be more tempted to cheat.
Post # 7
Perhaps seeing some type of professional – religious leader, counselor, etc. could help the couple explore the issue and work towards some type of resolution.
Post # 8
If he’s not listening, then maybe it’s time to try couples counseling?
Post # 9
Well said they addressed all of this in their premarital counseling and that he had improved for a little while but now i guess hes back to normal or something, shes got one friend tellin her to go for it and really dont know what to say to her.
Post # 10
I would never ever cheat. My rule is if I want it that bad, then I should get a divorce first. There would be reasons why you’d want out, but it’s cowardly and lazy to not put your affairs in order FIRST.
Two of my SILs are currently cheating on their SOs. One of the husbands found out, and he kicked her out with nothing but her clothes. Now she’s all “Why me??” and my response is “Because you’re a disrespectful idiot. Where’s your Boyfriend or Best Friend now??” My other SIL’s SO doesn’t know yet, but when he finds out, she’ll be just as @$$ed out as her sister! If you are that unhappy with the relationship, then get out. Don’t just cheat. That’s using both people and I have no compassion for anyone who would do that.
Post # 11
Before I met M I cheated on every single guy I was ever with. I was always looking for “something”:”More attention, better sex, more established, etc. When I met M, I was like wow… he has everything and I honestly haven’t ever had the urge to look elsewhere.
Post # 12
I have never had the impulse or desire to cheat on my current Fiance. However I did cheat once on an ex but the relationship was over and it was on again off again and to be honest I didnt know if we were on or off at the time but it was still something I felt horrid about and confessed to him. I will never do anything like that again, I cant even imagine doing that to my Fiance, he is wonderful!
Post # 13
I’m not going to lie, I’m the one that voted as having seriously considered it. It is not a period I am particularly proud of. Fiance (back before we were ever engaged) hit a rough patch a few years ago. We were both really young (19) and we were both working a lot. I saw him about once every 2 weeks or so. I was working at a haunted house and it was the guy that worked my scene with me. He was 30 and married with 2 kids and both of us were unhappy with what we had. We came pretty close, but in the end I never went through with it. I found out not too long afterward that he was screwing around with this little high school girl that he worked with. It really doesn’t matter now, to be honest. That whole period in our relationship is water under the bridge.
That was 3 years ago and he’s been gone for the past year since he joined the service. We have both grown up a lot and I’ve never had the urge since.
Post # 14
I have never cheated on anyone and never will. But it sounds like your friend and her husband need to read a book together called “The Love languages”. Great book abt how a man and a woman can feel loved. If your friend can feel loved, she won’t even think of cheating. Just a suggestion for her.
Post # 15
oh man, that’s tough. In my book, cheating is never okay.
I say that, having been cheated on by my ex twice; although I also broke some boundaries when I was younger – high school age, dated one boy for 2 months and then met someone new, went out once, decided to break up with the first one… yeah. Teenage drama, and certainly not anything I would condone.
Post # 16
I read the Love Language book, a present from my FMOL after we got engaged, and it was SO cool to recognize the ways we express love. I learned that he needs physical touch, which is great bc I can’t keep my hands off FI!, and I need quality time. THAT one helped a ton bc we had different ideas of what “quality” is.
I’ve never cheated and it makes me sick to think about even getting to that place in my life. I used to be really paranoid about Fiance cheating though, like really paranoid. No quick fix for that..just a lot of talking and a lot of me telling myself I’m crazy. Fiance is the last guy on earth who would cheat, he loves me an unfair amount and was raised immaculately by his amazing mother BUT media and experience tells us that cheating is very very common, and it is in some respect.