Weddingbee boards

Hey Bees,

I am majorly freaking out and just need to vent. Got a call from our wedding planner last night that she heard from a vendor friend that our photographer did not show up to a wedding she was booked for last weekend. Like no calls, no word, nothing, just did not show up! And this is not a new unknown photographer, it's someone who's been working in the area for over 10 years, and came highly recommended by both vendors and online reviews.

Now I am majorly freaking out. We've had a few issues this summer with this photog going AWOL, as in she stopped answering calls/emails, her facebook and email were deactivated temporarily, but thought it was all sorted out after we spoke to her and found out she had been in the hospital and just got behind. But that was a couple months ago, and she seemed to have got it back together. Just cracked it up to she was going through a rouch patch, and would more than likely have it under control for our wedding next summer.

But now I have lost a lot of faith in this photog. She literally MISSED a wedding! There is no re-do for that, no way to get that time back on film. And even though it is still a long time to my wedding, how do I trust that she can be relied on to be there?

My wedding planner wants us to start looking for a back up, and she and my videographer (close friend of the photog) have put in calls to the photog to find out what's up. I'm torn because I spent a lot of time looking for a photographer that I liked style-wise within out budget, and the thought of doing it over again makes me want to throw up. But so does the fear of having no pro photos from my wedding day!

I don't even know my point in writing this thread, I just need to vent! I don't want to be dealing with this!

@sarahbabs: Thanks for the hugs and luck, I sure need it!

@mittens111211: Yeah, I think that is a good plan. It definitely is worth the piece of mind. I am not sure if I will be able to get my deposit back from her, but it is probably worth the piece of mind to have someone I can trust!

@Ms. Martian: No, I am not sure yet. No one has been able to get ahold of her, including my planner, videographer, and another vendor who is actually her daughter's boyfriend. So I am still waiting to make any decisions until I hear from her, but I'm just afraid because last time she was in the hospital she at least had her father call clients with close events to let them know what was going on and that she would still be there. This doesn't seem like it happened this time. I would think that she normally has a back up plan, so I don't know what is going on. I hope I get more info soon!

@MsBrooklynA: I did check my contract, and it says nothing about her not showing/unable to perform for a wedding or a back-up plan, though I do remember asking her about it before we booked and I believe she essentially said it has never happened, but she would find a replacement. It does say that if I cancel/postpone the wedding/contract, the retainer is non-refundable, and says if for any reason the studio fails to comply with contract, her liability is limited to the retainer. But the contract is very basic and does not go into details as in if she does not contact in a timely manner, etc. So I'm not sure where I stand with it.

@Wonderstruck: No, not from Detroit, from Upstate NY, but I feel for those brides, because this is no fun!

@atomic: From the Albany, NY area, and thanks for the support!

Find a new photographer.  I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but a photographer who does not have a back up is just plain unprofessional.

@joy2011: @PinkPinstripes: I know it does sound a little grape-viney, but I do trust this information because the DJ in question actually owns one of the major wedding vendor referral sites in our area, and has only said good things about this photog in the past. I am still hoping to hear from her directly to find out what up, though as of the moment she has not returned our calls nor the wedding planner and our videographer. Even though her Facebook shows activity within the past day, so I know she is alive and well enough to be on Facebook.

Thanks bees...I really appreciate the support. I agree with what the majority is saying, and feel like it's not worth the stress for me to have to wonder if she is going to show up the day of our wedding, and am planning on booking a new photographer that I can trust, which is what my wedding planner recommended as well.

I am very lucky too, my wedding planner made this much easier on me and contacted 2 photographers for me who were available and in my budget and on opposite sides of the style spectrum, and essentially said choose between these 2. This is making it soooo much easier because it limits the choices!

Still have heard nothing from my original photographer, though she has had Facebook activity which means she is at least alive and capable of getting on the internet. At this point, I will more likey than not be booking someone new, and hoping I can get my deposit back from the original. Even if I can't, losing the money is worth the peace of mind!

Thanks again bees...it's great to have an audience of brides to help ensure that I am not just going nuts over nothing!

@TinyTina: Thanks so much! I'll let you know if I need photog recommendations...currently checking out the ones wedding planner sent, so after that if I need more I will def ask!

And sure, I will def send you my planner's name, I'll send you a PM. We were looking for DOC too and wound up hiring her for more!

this happen to my friend the other week,well similar, she tried to call just before the wedding, sort of a last minute check up on vendors, after try for a few days with him not answering calls, e-mails, text, she had to find a photographer 2 days before the wedding, and obviously couldn't be to picky, i just hope she gets some compo of the original photographer and that the photos come out ok, fingers crossed. 

i also don;t think you should be stressing about this set you wedding planner to work on sorting this out for you.

@mrskesslertobe: I would- except at some point today she deactivated her Facebook account. Which is what she did over the summer when no one could get in contact with her when she is in the hospital. I had tried messaging her/posting on her wall then, and the only response I got was a deactivated account. Eventually we got a call back then, but it was after a very stressful week or two of thinking she just up and disappeared. I forgave that one as an emergency that she just got herself behind on work, but to do the same thing again and this time miss a wedding is ridiculous.

In all likelihood she does have something bad going on in her personal life, but her instinct seems to be to panic and ignore/shut down all forms of communication (In August when she had health problems she deactivated Facebook, email deactivated, not returning phone calls). Even if she has something going on, the way she is handling it is not professional, she is running away instead of dealing with her clients. This confirms my instinct that I don't trust her with photographing our wedding, as much as I like her as a person and her work.

@AcquaPhoto: Thank you so much for your comment! Lots of useful info in there. I definitely didn't get strict enough contract with her, and I take fault for that, it was the first vendor we booked and we just went with the standard contract she gave us. Now I know better, and what questions to ask!

And I figured her breaking someone else's contract doesn't affect mine, but interesting to know that her lack of communication does! So if she is not responding to calls/emails and deactivated her facebook (for the SECOND time this summer...I "forgave" it the first time, this time is too much!) that would be a breech of contract? Do you know if there is a certain amount of time she would have to get back to me before the contract is breeched? Thanks again!

@RR: @Treejewel19: I know, trust me I keep going over this in my mind. I was SO careful researching photographers, and all these things are what drew me to her. Which makes me feel bad because I feel like something in her life must be a disaster to bring her to the point of ruining her reputation. Part of me wishes I could just stick by her and trust that things wil be better in the 8 months until my wedding...but to be honest I don't handle stress well and the fact that this could happen to me I think is more than I can take on top of normal wedding stress!

So I still haven't heard anything from the MIA photographer, but I noticed this new review on her WeddingWire page:

We got married in May 2011. It is now the end of September and we still do not have our proof album or any photos. We have contacted her 10 times and still no response. She has cashed all our checks and we have nothing to show for it. I have contact the small claims court but they said she has moved and we need an updated address which they are having trouble finding. They were able to tell me someone else would like to take her to small claims. I would not recommend her at all

So even though she showed up to this woman's wedding, she has yet to cough up the photos! So glad I was forewarned and have a chance to make other plans, though it looks like I will have more than a little trouble getting my money back!