Post # 1
I’m having a bit of a problem here.
We’ve changed our wedding date twice now.
We were originally going to get married on October 22, 2014 (The first day we met). Sadly, my father-in-law (FI’s dad) just passed away on this date. We decided out of respect for his family and to give him grieving time next year, we’d change the date.
So we decided we would change it to the day of our first date: 11/11. We started contacting vendors when it dawned on me, 11/11 is Veteran’s Day! Our venue will be closed for the holiday.
Now I’m just sitting here trying to come up with a date…
I just feel weird picking a random day out of the sky. Will I get over this?
Did any other bees have this problem?
Do you think even if I pick a random date, over the years it won’t matter because it will become meaningful?
Post # 3
I thought it looked nice. We wanted to get married in the summer. I wanted June, but FI has an exam in June and didn’t want the added stress, which is a good enough reason I think. I wanted to get married on a Wednesday. Why? No idea, but it’s a nice day. I didn’t like the look of the other Wednesdays in July, and the 30th looked nice to me, so that’s what we chose. Odd? Probably, but that’s our date now!
I’m not sure if everyone sees dates as “pretty” or “ugly” but I do!
I think you did the right thing by changing the date. It’s going to be a painful date for your new family and you want a new date for you both.
Look at a calendar, that’s how I did mine. You’ll know approximately which month you want, you’ll have a few options for day of the week, and that will only leave you with a few potential dates. OR check with your venue to see what they have free, look at all the dates and pick one which you like the look of.
Whatever date you choose with become a special date, it will become your wedding anniversary, so it doesn’t have to already be a special date in my opinion. Picking a random date will mean that you get a random date in the year to celebrate your anniversary, what more do you need?!
Good luck 🙂
Post # 4
Ourrs is random. 3/29/14. Prices go up in April.
Post # 6
That sucks that, that had to happen. I’m sorry for your loss, and your SO’s. I agree. I don’t think it would be a good idea to keep that wedding date. When I lost my aunt, the next year on the anniversary of her death all I could think about was her and how much I missed her.
I’m not sure I can help out in helping picking your date, only you and your fiance know each other well enough to do that, but I do think it won’t matter what date you pick in the end.
You will be so happy to marrying him and in the years to come that date will take on a huge meaning itself.
Tip: Make sure the city you pick doesn’t have a special event or celebration going on the same day as your new date. Hotels will be booked up and vendors will be taken. I learned that the hard way when I was trying to plan my overseas wedding without realizing there was a festival that week.
Post # 7
We eloped out-of-country when we managed to both schedule a long weekend. It meant nothing on its own, but we are a bi-national couple, meaning I’ve added that date to a metric tonne of very important paperwork. I can see it in my sleep!
I do think that whatever date you pick will become extremely meaningful to you, regardless of whether it held any special meaning before the day.
I did want to add, I think that was extremely considerate of you to change your original date. Taking the potential sensitivites of others into account in the midst of the wedding whirlwind is a very classy thing to do.
Post # 8
@petalpetal: I wanted a winter wedding so i had picked January 31st coz it almost always snows in Britain at the end of january….. but i just couldn’t wait that long so we moved it to November 1st 2014.
I would have liked to be married on halloween but that falls on a Friday and i don’t want to be married on a Friday.
Post # 9
@petalpetal: I agree with @Bette_Noire: whatever day you pick will become important.
We pick ours for convenience. I am a teacher and ours falls in the lond summer holiday so I can have time off before to do last minute things and we still have time for a honeymoon after. The exact date was down to the venue, it had to be a Saturday (for family’s convenience) and the 2nd had already been booked, 16th was getting a bit late in the holiday
Post # 10
@petalpetal: we always wanted a September wedding. Its my favorite month. We met and went on our first date Sept 14th and thats the day we got married
Post # 11
- Wedding: May 2014 - Scottish Rite Cathedral (New Castle, PA)
His parents anniversary is May 1st, my parents are May 3rd and we got engaged May 4th so we wanted something around those days. We wanted a Saturday and that fell on May 3rd for this year so that’s the day we picked!
Post # 12
I picked two: weather and cost.
We will be getting married on 3 July 2015 (in Australia 03/07/2015).
We were originally planning to get married in colder weather in a different state so it was going to be 10/10/2015 (exactly two years to the date we got engaged) but because we are now getting married in our home state it’s changed.
Friday – $35 cheaper per person at the venue
And the season is the “nice” season for us. We only have alright weather for approximately three months; June to August. Thus the month.
We also had to work around other dates for work; my work has a MASSIVE global conference in the second week of July every year and we think the V8 Supercars will be on in our area at the end of June.
Post # 13
Originally we were going to get married November 1st, 2014 which is close to our dating anniversary, but we realized the leaves would be gone so we moved it up to October 4,2014 because of how the date looks. 10/04/14
Post # 14
August is “our month”. We started dating August 19th and got engaged on that date too. So we wanted to get married in August. So we just chose a date in August that suited us. The first Saturday is a national holiday, so that didn’t work. The second didn’t work for some reason. The third was DH’s birthday so we ended up with the fourth Saturday.
Post # 15
We knew the season, but the exact Saturday was up to the availability of the venue. Our top 2 venues only had 1 Spring Saturday open a year out! So that made the decision for us.
Post # 16
We haven’t booked yet, but we chose the latest Sunday that gave us off-peak discounts, excluding Palm Sunday. However, if we pick one venue in particular, it makes more sense to go with Saturday during the day, so it would be March 28. I also have a thing with numbers and prefer a “nice” number, which is completely subjective and up to me, lol.
Post # 17
@petalpetal: I totally had the same problem. We wanted to get married on May 25, 2014- it’s our anniversary, 5 is my favorite number, the weather is nice for an outdoor wedding. And it was a Sunday on a holiday weekend (great bc our guest list is 90% OOT). FI and I both had our heart set on it. But, my little sister and I were both engaged- I wanted May 25 and she wanted May 10! Our family lives out of state and we live a 10 hour drive apart. My sister got engaged first, so she felt she should get first pick (she had been engaged for a couple years already and ended up having a baby) and my parents agreed. They asked out of consideration for our out of state family to have a 6 month buffer- that means November! I never wanted a fall wedding, I still don’t, but I didn’t want to wait another year either- FI is 30 already! But I had a REALLY REALLY hard time with it at first.
My best advice is that when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Turns out November is the start of off-season so we to off-season discounts on our venue. Then I wanted 11/1- it was a Saturday and a “cute date.” or even the next Saturday because its a holiday weekend (veteran’s day). 14 months before, both Saturdays were already booked. We thought about looking at other venues but felt the time crunch, so we booked the third Saturday in Nov- the 15th. Luckily we live in SoCal, so there is still only a 9% chance of rain (our venue is outdoors and I had no desire to get married inside). It’s just what was available, it’s not “cute”, and it’s not special or significant. BUT, it WILL be the day I marry the love of my life and it will be special and important from now on. And we will always have our dating anniversary, the day we first met, etc. Now we are just getting an EXTRA special day!! Another anniversary! Bonus!! Also, I would try to avoid picking another date until you know what is available- then you don’t get your heart set on another date and potentially broken again of it doesn’t work out (been there, done that!). I know this is hard *hugs* but I’m sure your new anniversary is going to be amazing!
I think it was very thoughtful and considerate of you to change the date after your FI’s father passed. Even if they don’t say anything to you, I’m sure they really appreciate it- ESP Your FI. I can’t imagine getting married on the anniversary of my father’s death. Too many brides don’t think about other people.