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So we have a little problem, and maybe I'm not the only one. I've been on various BC pills for the last 9 years. When starting a new relationship, things are frisky. Then after settling in they chill out- which is normal, but in three relationships now (and the one I'm marrying in July) my sex drive has gone to zero. He'll offer to do things for me, and I don't even want them. I'm currently on LoSeasonique, and have been for a year. I also haven't had a period in a year- even on the placebo week. This also happened on my last BC pill, which was why I switched to the lower dose to no avail. Last BF in between switching pills, I used condoms for about a month an sex drive went back up, I was actually iniating things. On LoSeasonique, I have been much more frisky during the week you take placebos the last three times. So I am wondering if there is something wrong with me that I need to treat to help keep him happy, or if it is the BC pill that is making me a sexless personality. Has anyone found a BC pill that doesn't destroy sex drive? I really don't dig condoms but would love to actually want to use them again, know what I mean?
This is a pretty common side effect. I have NO drive at all now, I'm going off the pill because it isn't worth it to me. I'm thinking about going to an IUD.
It's really common! Since you've already gone on condoms once, I rec. reading the book "taking charge of your fertility." As it seems there's no "medical" reason to stay on BC there's ways to naturally work with your fertility that can actually be more effective.
We're using the STM (sympto-thermal method) of Fertility Awareness Method with no sex on the "fertile" days. Others use a barrier method.
The best is that it's free, completely natural, better for you AND the environment, and no side effects :-)
Ohhh Yeah this is happening to me and it sucks! but the reason I went on the pill was because I didn't have a period for almost six months and I wasn't pregnant.
When I was on nortrel it didn't kill my sex drive but both times I was on a generic it kills my sex drive, but la da di I don't have health insurance now, so I have to take whatever the state will give me, and it's a generic. I'm on this thing called Select Plan for women in PA that don't have health insurance and it pays for your birth control and yearly checkups
Like the others said, one side effect of BC is low sex drive. I have had many issues with the pill, went through quite a few different ones due to emotional issues. I went down to some of the lowest dose pills, but that still didn't solve all my problems on it, so I went off. I have been off now for 1 1/2 yrs (sticking with condoms) and I feel so amazing I don't think I will EVER go back. Some women just don't do well on the hormones!
One option you might try is the Nuva ring-I felt that I did a little better on that emotionally, but it irritated me to wear it.
I have definitely noticed that problem, and I'm looking forward to going off the pill and seeing how that affects it!
I too have this problem! I have been on the Nuvaring for about 8 months and I am just never in the mood! It totally sucks!
I think I've heard that Seasonique has one of the highest hormone levels and thus the most severe side effects. I would definitely talk to your doctor, especially since you haven't gotten your period in a year. There are so many different types of birth control because each works differently and certain prescriptions are better for certain women.
Going off the pill made a world of difference for me. We use the same method as KLP2010--and I will never go back!
I'm going to third KLP. I've used FAM for a year and a half with A. no side effects, B. no cost, and C. no oopsie babies. Fertility awareness is definitely worth a look if you're unhappy with your pill side effects. Even if you are happy with your birth control methods, every woman should have this knowledge about how their bodies work. It's important to be informed. :)
@kirabee: LoSeasonique which the OP uses is pretty low hormone-wise.
BTW, I forgot to say before but I am on one of the lowest hormone pills and it doesn't work for me at all. You might want to consider one with different types of hormones, it could have a different effect on you.
I am on the 'sugar pill' week this week with LoSeasonique. I think I am just going to not go back to the pharmacy, and try switching to a combo of condoms and STM just to see what my body calls normal. Could keep you all updated if anything works :-) If not, then maybe it is something else with me mentally or stressed...
I believe that is a pretty common side affect. I was on various BC including ortho tri-cyclen and nuvaring, and I had basically no sex drive, I could go for weeks (which is a lot from someone who would do it 2x/day 7days/week). I had to take myself off and then my drive kicked into overdrive and it was almost like I was making up for lost time. Now, FI and I are using a combo of the "pull out" and condom method.
I too have heard its a really common side effect. I've been on bc since about a year before I ever started having sex... so honestly I have no idea what "normal" would be for me if I wasn't on it. I do know that my drive is lower than I would prefer and I do kind of blame the bc. My plan is to stay on it until after we're married (my insurance does not cover pregnancy so we REALLY have to be careful until I'm on his) then talk to FI about getting off for a period of time to see what happens.
I've had this problem for the past few years - I've been on the pill for 11 years, and it wasn't bad for the first 8 but then they discountinued the pill I was on and my new one (LoEstrin24) KILLED my sex drive. But, good news ladies!!! I went off the pill like two weeks ago and it is like I was asleep for the last few years and I have been awakened! Already it made a WORLD of difference and I was so scared it would last forever. But no- believe it or not- just like that, I have a libido again!!!! AMEN!!
I don't want to go on the Pill for this reason alone. I've never been on any kind of BC though, so I feel like I *should* try it first, but don't really want to, especially cause of the synthetic factor and the side effects.... ugh... I hate these kind of decisions.
Birth control sucks :( I also have a super low sex drive on the pill. I've tried several different pills, depo, nuvaring, IUD...ugh. FI and I have not used condoms for 4.5+ years now, though, so when we tried them again a few months ago he really didn't like it as much. I know they have all sorts of "super sensitive" condoms... anyone have some that they would reccomend?
Same thing happened to me when I was on NuvaRing. I went back to condoms and things are much better now! ;)
I've learned so much from this post, and know now it's not just me! Fwwww!
My FSIL is a pharmacist and was saying that many woman actually have more of an adverse reaction to the low dose hormone pills and worse side effects. Don't remember the reasoning why, because it got pretty technical, but I'm happy to read about these other more natural alternatives. Thanks ladies!
Neele - If you start using a Fertility Awareness Method, you'll only need the condom for about a week-10 days a month. We will be abstaining during that time frame, but most people use a barrier method. The longer you practice and the more in tune with your body you are, the time frame will drop... obviously, in the start you want to be safe while you learn.
That's the thing with BC, you're doping your system (and then the environment) with all these hormones and chemicals non-stop for years daily... when in reality, your fertility window is around 5 days (the egg can live for 2 and sperm for 5). If your method fails at all, it will only fail during that week. Not the other 3 your altering your bodies natural function.
I just went to my doctor about this. He told me the loss of sex drive is because the pill causes your body to produce less testosterone. A VERY common side effect with BC pills across the board. He perscribed me a topical testosterone creame, and it's been a little over a week and I am suddenly having the same urges to have sex like I used to. It's AMAZING!
FutureMrsZapper - There's a ton of threads on here about FAM. Just use the search widget in the upper right hand corner of the page to search for "STM" or "FAM" or "NFP" which are all 100% natural methods of preventing pregnancy. Check out the book I mentioned above in my first post. Congrats on choosing a healthier method!
Another thing not mentioned, is that a lot of women actually discover health issues more quickly by using a FAM vs BC. If you run into an issue, you also have the data to show your Dr. Once you are ready to begin a family, you also know exactly when to do so :-0 i.e. (tmi) 3 days ago would have been prime baby making ;-) Sure enough, the next day my temp confirmed that I had ovulated.... I love that I know that about my body! For years and years, I got confused by the cyclical changes... I thought certain weeks something was wrong... Now, I know exactly what every little symptom means... and know when I'm starting my period. Now I take midol before it begins. I haven't had cramps or discomfort in 3 months!
@KLP2010 Thank you for the info. I will look further into this :)
Yeah.. BC is terrible. I read somewhere that when you are on BC that your sense of smell decreases, so you are less likeley to be attracted to the pheromones of your SO. I am not sure if it true but it makes sense to me. I am not on BC but we use condoms and I dont miss it one bit.
monalisa670- I am also on Loestrin24...I have endometriosis and they wanted to put me on the lowest estrogen hormone and they wanted to stop my periods, so i completely skip the sugar pills every month and just go to the next pack....and i totally agree, i lost my libido..bad! like im never in the mood for it an im 22...it sucks..no BC works for me or my cramps, ive been on 6 differnt kinds, so we're kind of at a stand still right now and im still on loestrin24....this scared me at first because i thought i was just not interested in my fiance but apparently its not me!! yay!!
I'm so glad this is up here. I honestly broke down crying in the middle of doing the deed about a month ago because I felt so bad that I just wasn't that into it but was doing it to make FI happy. I'm totally with you KLP, when we were first together, it was like all new relationships, but as time as worn on, I can go weeks with nothing. When we're in the midst I sometimes stop and think "ooooohhhh yaaaaa, I remember now, this is fun!", but I rarely initiate and when FI does want to..... I sort of sigh and try to work myself into it. It's the worst feeling in the world.
Does anyone know if you change from BC to an IUD if there's a period of time that you should use a back up method? I'm wondering if it's worth changing over right after we come back from our HM... I would like to do it before, but I don't want to run the risk of getting my period on our wedding or HM. At least with BC pills I can control that. Thoughts?
I have the same problem. I'm on Ortho Cyclen and it's killed my sex drive. I feel bad as my SO has been supportive and understanding, with moments of absolute frusteration! However, I am back in school and don't want to change to another method that may not be as successful.
@MadiLove918: Ummm not a clue. It's just something I'm thinking about. I haven't started researching yet really except hearing good things about IUDs. Any recommendations?
@bakerella Sounds just like me on and OFF the pill. I know most people say that after stopping the pill, the sex drive came back quickly. Well, I'm obviously in the minority because I've been off it about 2 1/2 months and still no sex drive. Soo frustrating....I hope the IUD works for you. And I hope my sex drive comes back someday and soon. I feel bad for my hubby because he's a little frustrated and I have to "force" myself to be in the mood most times.
@bakerella: With a copper IUD, it works immediatly. If you are going to the Mirena, you might need a backup for a week just like when you start a new pill.
I'm going to the Dr next week and hopefully getting an IUD and I can post back about it if you would like!
very common, i had the same problem on the pill, patch, nuvaring.. i even have the same problem with the very-very-very low dose of hormones emitted by my iud.. it cause me to not even want to think about him touching me.. i actually get grumpy when he wants to fool around!! it sucks and i wish it wasn't so!
@MissAsB: Absolutely let me know how it goes! I told FI last night that I was thinking about stopping my pills after our HM to switch to an IUD and he got all freaked out for a second. He said "I was curious how you were going to end that sentence...", LOL! But he thinks it's a great idea to switch to an IUD and let my body sort of get back into it's own rhythm for a year or two before we TTC. I can't believe I'm seriously talking about TTC. That's ridiculous. LOL!
@bakerella: i have an iud, and honestly love it!! it's my second one!
@brittanymichelle: The only reason I feel hesitant to get one at this point (or to go off the pill at all) is that I like having control over when I get my period. So if it happens to fall on while we're away on vacation, I can skip it, awesome! Plus I always know EXACTLY when it's going to come. I like the predictability of it.
I had the same problem when I was on Apri, which is a generic combination pill. Went to condoms for a little while, and I think I actually overwhelmed then-DBF with my sex drive.
Long and short of it- I have PCOS and it's almost impossible to predict when my period will happen. There was a lot of unnecessary stress with using condoms. I was then on NuvaRing for a while and actually enjoyed it. Fewer sex drive problems, which was nice.
Sadly, I also have some blood pressure issues, and my BP. I'm now on progestin-only pills. They're tricky, because you have to take them exactly at the same time every day, but no decrease in sex drive!
YES!!! Omg yes. I hate my pills, I feel so terrible for my SO. I know I'm not the same person sexually as I once was and I don't feel like that's fair to him, but trying to convince myself to be "into it" is so hard and often leaves me feeling like I've done something I really didn't want. Almost like a dirty, used feeling even though I love my SO more then anything and WANT to share things with him in my mind, my body just won't cooperate.
I really need to speak to my doctor about it, it's starting to rule our physical relationship.
@MissSawyer: You aren't alone in feeling that way. I'm really fighting with it myself. I stopped the pill about a month ago and my sex drive still hasn't really come back, to my dismay. The doctor wants me to try Nuvaring and if that doesn't work, maybe Implanon.
@KLP2010: Are you talking about a form of the rythm method? Using any kind of rythm method of birth control is risky and not even close to as effective as the pill or condoms which are almost perfectly effective when used correctly.
This same thing is happening to me and has been for the last couple of years! I feel so bad for my husband! I just thought it was a psychological thing & I couldn't turn off my brain in order to have a good time!
My hubby and I use birth control and condoms. I was just starting to talk him into losing the condoms cause I thought that might be the reason why I was having difficulties.
I'm definitely going to talk to my gynocologist about my Apri prescription at my next appt. in a few weeks and see if we can change it.
Question about the nuvaring.. Does it come out when you have sex? And is there an applicator to insert it?
Sorry TMI.. if any of you aren't comfortable with that sort of thing.
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