Planning while waiting?

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
2916 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

it’s fine to plan before you’re officially engaged, as long as you both know you’re headed in that direction. don’t book any vendors or anything until you’ve set a date, but there’s nothing wrong with making the guestlist, checking out venues… my husband and i started planning our wedding a couple of months before we were engaged. he already had the ring, i was just waiting for him to pop the question.

as far as your bridal party goes, if you just want to have a maid of honor then that’s what you should do. you will save yourself a ton of stress. i only had 3 girls in my wedding and i had drama. if i could do it over, i would just have a maid of honor. and it’s pretty common to have an uneven bridal party, so if your fiance really wants to have his brother and his best friend, he should 🙂

Post # 4
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2015 - tbd

We started planning on paper about 4 months ago. He won’t have the money to get the ring we picked out for another 6 months because we agreed he’d be debt free before he bought it. We’re planning a full blown wedding for the summer of next year. 

Post # 6
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2015 - tbd

damarajade:  Small town of maybe 2000 people. We can book a month out and not have troubles. I was thinking of using one of my dad’s shops anyway. We’re thinking backyard bbq and bonfire. 90% of our guests are true rednecks. 

Post # 8
Member
8073 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

damarajade:  I think it’s fine to research when you KNOW it’s coming. I sure did and it made planning and the engagement much less stressful. I already knew my top vendors and we booked them all with still a year to go till the wedding. 

But I would stick to your guns about not booking anything before the engagement is official. And tell him that. Booking before the ring is just going to give you more anxiety about waiting for It. It’s the cart before the horse.

Post # 9
Member
992 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

damarajade:  FI and I actually had a conversation out guest list way back in July of last year, it was our first in depth conversation about wedding planning. Not too long after that he suggested the Storybook Circus theme for our wedding and I ran with it on a secret pinterest board.

Then in Aug. I had a conversation with my parents about my future wedding, my dad requested to “walk me down an asile at a church or chaple” so I started googling and found our venue, showed it to FI and he loved it too.

He asked my dad for his blessing in Nov. then started working on a proposal video.

Feb. of this year he proposed and by early April we had our big things booked and deposits paid for our May 2015 wedding. 

So I say go for it, so that when the proposal comes you can knock things off your to do list right off the bat! 

Post # 10
Member
3047 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Honestly… If you two have a rough date, a guest list, and the rings are on the way… You guys ARE engaged, for all intents and purposes, don’t you think? I mean, it isn’t like you’ll be having venues you contact ask you to email pictures of you wearing your ring as proof of engagement. Proposals involving a ring didn’t even start to happen before about the 1920’s when they started happening in silent movies as a big, romantic gesture that would get across to the audience without sound.

it will be nice to have that ‘moment’ – but especially for couples like you guys where it’s a sure bet, it is just a moment. An incredibly special, remember-it-for-life thing, but not life altering because that has already happened.

Post # 12
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Sounds like you’re both on the same page! I think it’s only a problem when one of you is planning a wedding and the other isn’t on board. If you can talk openly, you’re probably okay. If you have to hide your plans, it’s time to examine why you have to hide.

Post # 14
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Yeah, we were similar. I wanted earlier, he knew he wanted marriage but worried about money. 

Post # 15
Member
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

damarajade:  I’m totally in the same boat as you are! He has the ring but we’ve started planning already. Guest list is pretty much done, were shooting for next fall (maybe Nov 2015), and we know we want engagement photos done in the next few months! We’re looking to buy some land to build on but we also want to use that for our wedding venue (and if we can build the barn first then we can use that for the wedding too!) 

Although I’ve worked in bridal/planning I am planning to buy that “Wedding Planning for Dummies” book once we’re engaged to use the charts they have!

happy planning! And I hope he pops the question soon!

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors