Post # 1
I am not a Hostess I am not a long time Bee I am just me. I just want to tell everyone that sometimes this ring board makes me sad.
Please remember that the woman in this thread love their ring. They like the size. They like the stone the chose. They love they didnt choose a stone. They love the cut they chose. They love the metal they chose. The love the ring they received from the love of their life.
Stop the hating ppl. Keep it nice. Some of these ppl take what you say to heart. Should they really take to heart the comments of ppl they never will meet in cyberspace- NO but some do.
Relax and love this thread for what it is…a place for ppl to share their loves, experiences, their stories and ask for advice. Try to be nice when you reply ….if you dont got nothing nice to say dont say nothin! You can be constructive without the snark, rudeness or pettiness that some ppl use to make a point.
Just my two cents. You can agree or not but I thought I would put it out there. You know who you are. Most ppl here are kind and compassionate and try to help other ppl here.
Just remember no one is perfect and everyone has their own taste. Dont cheapen their taste by being hateful.
GelaMac-lover of all things shiny and sparkling
Post # 3
Whilst I mainly agree it might also help if people who don’t want to hear opinions don’t ask for them! I mean if you don’t want to hear someone doesn’t like your ring then don’t ask do you like my ring/what do you think of my ring!
Post # 4
@j_jaye: like I said some ppl can give opinions without the attitude. Kindly say that it is not your taste and then explain why but dont be hateful about it.
When I ask for an opinion I want honesty but when ppl are just rude for the sake of being rude it isnt an opinion anymore it is snark and makes the OP feel bad about something they might love.
If you dont like something it doesnt mean you can just post a rude comment. Just move on to the next post if you cant be honest without being hurtful. That was the point of my post.
Post # 5
@GelaMac: awesome. Well said! I don’t like when people say ” I hate 3 stone e rings” thanks because that’s what I’m getting! Lol whatever.
Post # 6
@GelaMac: But snark is in the eye of the beholder also. Some people are really sensitive, others not so much. Everyones opinions is valid regardless of whether it is what you want to hear or not. Snark is moderated by the moderaters- it is up to them and no one else to decide whether something is snarky or not IMO.
Post # 7
@j_jaye: Obviously you are not getting the point of my post and that is ok. Other Bees will and that is reason why I posted in the first place. Everyone is intitled to their opinion and I value yours.
Post # 8
@GelaMac: No I get the point of your post I just don’t think it is your job to school bees on how they should or shouldn’t post.
Post # 9
@j_jaye: With that logic we shouldn’t have mods because how dare they restrict what our wild imaginations can conjure on the internet? She never said people aren’t allowed to speak honestly. She also never denied the existance of people who ask for opinions when they generally just want agreement with some ideal already stuck in their head. She’s simply saying that there is no reason for people to be purposefully, even maliciously rude to others. Reminders like that are often helpful because while, yes, the moderators are in charge of moderating, sometimes when we remind ourselves and others the we all desire kindness and consideration it helps keep those negative instances from occuring. She’s not taking it upon herself to be an “unofficial moderator.” She’s simply stating that rude behavior hurts people and it’s best if we each individually strive to not let it happen.
Post # 10
I do understand the point of your post. However, when a thread exists that asks for posters’ least favorite types of rings, a poster who is sensitive about her ring choice would be smart to avoid it.
And if the worst thing about someone’s day is that they find out that a person that they don’t know IRL doesn’t like their halo/princess/marquise/pave/gemstone, well that’s still a pretty good day, IMO.
Post # 12
@j_jaye: I agree. It’s a slippery slope.
When some girls phrase things like “HONESTLY, what do you think?” I will give my honest opinion because I think that’s what they’re looking for.
If someone posts “I’m engaged, ring porn!” I will never put a rude comment even if the ring isn’t my taste. If I don’t have something nice to say, I won’t say it.
I admit I have been involved in a few moissanite debates during my tenure here at Weddingbee, but I try to stay away from getting into an argument on those threads.. I guess it’s an agree to disagree type thing.
Post # 13
- Wedding: September 2013 - B&B
@GelaMac: Totally agree! I wanted to say something like this recently on another thread, but you are much more eloquent and said it so much nicer. Needless to say I DIDN’T post! I wrote it out, realized it wouldn’t be helpful, and erased. My point was basically “leave each to make their own choice, and be respectful” but it wouldn’t have come out just that way. So I decided to be adult and not say something sarcastic, even if it was for the sake of defending others’ who may have been hurt. I think sometimes we get all caught up in the debate and want to defend our choices or others, especially if someone said it rather meanly.
And I agree, there’s a big difference between someone posting for opinions who doesn’t want to hear them, even the nice ones, and someone’s well meaning opinion taken out of context… and someone posting just to be mean, belittle, or use rude words. GelaMac has a great point. Yes, it’s the internet, and yes we have a certain amount of freedom to say what we want, but we also are human beings talking to other human beings. Why fester in nastiness and snark if you honestly don’t have to?
Post # 14
Alot of people said they hated solitaire square cut rings. Exactly what i have.
But what they have is a ring i personally dont like. Do i take offence? NO because a ring is a personal choice and i LOVE my ring.
We cant always accomodate sensitive people unfortunately.
Post # 15
@claireos: No but she is passing judgement on what is malicious and isn’t. As I said there are moderators on this site that determine, as per the TOS that we all agree to when we sign up, what is snarky/mean/malicious/against the TOS. Starting a thread to scold or shame people isn’t really in the spirit of the community!
Post # 16
@j_jaye: I don’t really take this as a shaming thread – to me it is just a reminder that our words can hurt feelings, so we should take care with them. That makes sense to me!