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Please, for the love of JAYsus, just call me back!

posted 5 months ago in The Lounge
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    1.
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    415 posts
    Helper bee
    Ms. Peach    September 24, 2011   Chicago

    So, my bff from high school lives out of state. We talk regularly on the phone - multiple times a week, even a day some times.

    The problem is that she consistently carries on conversations with her daughter while we are on the phone. Her daughter is 3, and of course I don't expect her to ignore/not attend to her child. I'm not talking about, "Mommy can I have this." "Yes/No you can/can't" exchanges. I'm talking about drawn out, minutes long exchanges. She is clearly in the middle of something with her kid, and it's not a good time to talk.

    And, after sitting on the other end, watching my life tick by, I suggest she call me back. She replies that she is "multi taksing" and "welcome to the world of motherhood" She is a SAHM, and she's doesn't really ever leave her daughter. Even at night, you'd think she could call after her daughter is in bed, but she sleeps with her and they go to bed at the same time. (I know that will raise some eyebrows. That's a whole seperate post.) She really has very minimal time away from her. Even if her husband is home it seems.

    I'm not a mother. I have been around children my whole life though, babysat, worked at pre schools and Nannied. I know that's not the same as being a parent, but I get it. I would not be upset if she told me she couldn't talk. Let me go abruptly. Whatever.

    I guess I would just rather talk to her less often than spend half the time ON the phone with her wasting my time. I feel like it makes me sound like a bad friend to say that though. I'm sure if I told her it would offend her. Am I being unreasonable?

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    MsPanda    August 17, 2013   Oregon

    As a SAHM I understand both sides of this. I hate when I am on the phone and my children do this. But at the same time my children (4 and 2) Follow me when ever I am on the phone. they could be playing in their room just fine but as soon as that phone rings they are by my side... It really is a juggling act.

     
    3.
    Member
    415 posts
    Helper bee
    Ms. Peach    September 24, 2011   Chicago

    @MsPanda:  I understand what you're saying.

    My complaint is that my friend starts the conversations with her daughter. She'll call me when they are in the middle of a craft project and then spend the first 5 minutes of the phone call explaining to her daughter how to paint a pine cone.                      

     
    4.
    Member
    2,330 posts
    Buzzing bee
    secondchances    August 2012   Western MD

    I have friends that do this too but I just roll with it. It may help to do similar things to her constantly for a few weeks. Then she may see what it feels like. It is better then saying something and may still get the point across.

     

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