- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
Where do I start…..I’m an encore bride and did the whole wedding thing before. My FI is an encore groom and only did the justice of the peace. We’ve been together 4 1/2 yrs, engaged 2 yrs. While we are planning a very small, intimate wedding of 60, I find myself just wanting to say forget it, let’s just go to court and get married. FI is not one to really care about thse things or even like parties. However, he has become so involved in the planning and every small detail, including my dress, bridesmaids, etc. We’ve done almost everything as far as planning and booking vendors is concerned, but I’m getting very turned off to the idea of having a “wedding”.
I want to be married to him, I wish we’d met 10 years ago and have no doubt that he is my soul mate and the man I was meant to spend my life with. I just don’t know why I am feeling this way about our big day. We’ve gotten the ‘are you crazy for doing this again’, ‘you guys are crazy to even mention getting married again’ and all the other not so nice but expected comments since this will be our 3rd marriage, for both of us. Both of our first was the “do the right thing and get married because there’s a baby on the way”, so I always say that it wasn’t one of choice for either of us. I did do the whole thing for my second marriage and although we divorced, we are best of friends and our marriage served a purpose in both our lives. I’m a big believer that everything in our life happens for a reason, so can say I don’t regret having married the 2nd time around. But for the first time I want to scream from the roof tops that I’m in love and want to get married. I think if I had met him 10 yrs ago, where I was in my life, I would not have appreciated who he is and would have probably never even dated him.
Everyone in both our families says that our relationship is like nothing they’ve ever seen us have before and we seem so happy together, which we are. I can’t say it’s cold feet because I’m not doubting getting married, I guess it’s HOW we will get married. I’ve “jokingly” said to FI lets just forget the whole thing and elope, and he says No, I’m enjoying planning our wedding, I’m looking forward to that day. We’ve had a very difficult time the last 18 months, when I had a work related injury that put me in a wheelchair, probably for life. We’ve gone thru so much and have gotten closer, even though we don’t even live together. It’s due to space issue as far as merging our families and moving my son’s school but have worked it out to move in together 3 months before the wedding.
What do I do? Will this go away? Has anyone else ever felt this way?