Please help! He puts his family before me. Should i leave?

posted 4 weeks ago in Weddingbee
Post # 2
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

Hell no you should not marry him.  You should run like your tampon string is on fire.  Get out now, because the rest of your life is going to look exactly like this if you don’t.  He’s still controlling you and you will never be ahead of his family.

Post # 3
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

if you are questioning now, it’s only going to get worse.  i think you know your answer.

Post # 4
Member
355 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

He gets mad if he has to pay for milk??

This sounds like a mess, leave.

Post # 5
Member
1314 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

The children they have custody of – are they yours and your future husband’s children? 

 

Post # 6
Member
13826 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If you feel trapped, controlled and disrespected now, just wait until they’ve really got you trapped with teh marriage certificate.  I’d imagine things only get worse.

Post # 7
Member
2087 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017 - Outside in Paris

No. No. No. 

 

Post # 8
Member
4133 posts
Honey bee

KiwiDerbyBride :  “You should run like your tampon string is on fire”

+1000 LOL + best advice I’ve recently seen on weddingbee 🙂

Your situation sounds absolutely suffocating OP. Living practically on the doorstep of his meddling, judgmental family and with a so-called partner who favours them over you and acts like a dipshit if you say you’re out of milk?!?! There is literally nothing to stay for and this situation will only grow more intolerable, more claustrophobic. Even if you have health issues OP, you’d be better off on your own, even on disability benefits in a small apartment.

You CAN have a decent life OP, but you have to ditch this family that I’m picturing as something straight out of The Hills Have Eyes in order to go find this  life.

Post # 9
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

What a horrible, suffocating mess.  The bad news is this will never change unless both of you move FAR FAR AWAY. Even then you may not escape the clutches of unbearable in-laws. If it’s like this now, I dread to think how much they will interfere with your wedding plans and the rest of your life – nothing is going to change when you are married.

From your post, it doesn’t sound like you have much faith in FI and that he’s not really prepared to support you when his parents are unreasonable. Unless you want to live like this forever, you need to get out.

 

 

It will take time and planning. You must have someone, somewhere you can reach out to. Parents? Sibling? Friend? All you need is enough cash to get to where you need to go, and a little left over. It takes a lot of guts but you will feel instantly lighter and thank yourself in years to come for being brave enough to do it. Good luck.

Post # 11
Member
215 posts
Helper bee

I read about 3 sentences in and already say NO. Leave. 

Post # 12
Member
663 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Do you have any friends or family of your own that you can stay with until you get on your feet? No, you should not marry this man. It’s only going to get worse after marriage.

Leave a comment


Get our weekly roundup of the best of Weddingbee.
I agree to receive emails from the site. I can withdraw my consent at any time by unsubscribing.

Find Amazing Vendors