(Closed) Please help me with this “Mom” Issue!!!

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

If you aren’t ready to speak to her, perhaps send her a card and a floral arrangement to wish her happy birthday.

Post # 4
Member
572 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I think the suggestion oracle has is nice.  You are ackowledging it but not putting yourself fully out there if you aren’t ready.

Post # 5
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Forgive her? Somebody has to make the first move!

Post # 6
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Honestly, for me personally it would really depend on the lines that were crossed.  But as you don’t want to discuss those issues, which I totally understand.  I think a card or flowers is a good suggestion (as Oracle stated), so that you’re saying you still care but aren’t ready to talk. 

-Sorry you’re going through this!

Post # 9
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i would call her on her birthday, and say something along the lines of “while i am still very hurt by what you said and have not moved on from our fight, you’re still my mom and it’s your birthday and i didn’t want to miss wishing you a happy birthday.”

Post # 10
Member
611 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think I would do whatever it is you usually do for her birthday.  I don’t know what the argument was about, but maybe you guys should talk about how each of you feel, or agree to disagree?  I don’t have any background on you and your mom’s relationship either, but if it were my mom, and lets say this was her last birthday, I’d feel pretty badly I let an argument get between us.  I’m not saying I live in fear of my mom dying everyday, but it does help me put things in perspective.  I’m also not saying to just let it go, but sometimes you can just put things aside for a day, and talk about it later. I hope it gets resolved, or at least you can hear each other out and respect each other’s view points even if they’re different.

Post # 12
Member
572 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I think you need to decide what you are comforable with first and formost.  If it’s lunch, then great.  Ask her if she wants to go to lunch and let her take the lead. 

Post # 13
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@happyb: if you are considering lunch, then perhaps invite her and see if she’s willing to accept.  Life is too short to remain angry, if you are ultimately willing to move past this disagreement/issue

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