(Closed) “Please sit in alphabetical order, knees facing the centerpiece. Keep your hands

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I would just seat them with the rest of your family. As you said, they have arms and legs and if they want to start drama, they will, no matter where you seat them. I think your relatives would be more forgiving of any shenanigans they may pull where a stranger would probably be embarrassed and uncomfortable if they were seated by them and they caused a scene. 

Post # 4
3978 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I think it depends on the setup of your reception hall. If I were you based on what you’ve said, this is what I’d do.

If you have a long table for the wedding party maybe you can have several round tables all along the front. Decorate all of them with slightly fancier centerpieces and seat a larger group of people who are family or close to you in those tables. Put a couple tables of space between them and seat them with people who you think they’ll find interesting (brothers with women of their own age–whether they’re married or not guys tend to behave better around women they find attractive). Maybe do some of those ice breaker table games/get-to-know-you’s. Have a good emcee who can distract people and serve limited or no alcohol and have good food and preferably live music. Then just keep it short–don’t give them 4 hours to build up a conflict.

Post # 5
1890 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Can you ask your brothers if they want to sit with the rest of the family, or if they’d prefer to sit with people their own age?  I like what @kala_way said about putting them with women their age to encourage them to act better, but you may want to think about if they’re going to behave themselves or act a fool around attractive women.  I think the best way to go is just asking them and doing what makes them happy, so as to not instigate anything.

Post # 6
322 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I’m sorry, I don’t know what to tell you to do here.  I have a similar situation, but it’s with my sister and I’m at a loss for how to make it work.  Is there any way you could have your parents keep an eye on them and tell them to leave if they get out of hand? 

I know some places require you to hire “security”… if it comes down to it, maybe you could mention something to the security guard? 

Sorry I’m not more help, but I really feel for you 🙁

Post # 8
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

What kind of tables are you using?  If you go with long, rectangle ones, in 4-5 long rows, then there really isn’t an “important” table per-say.  You can seat them at the table the family will be at, but towards the end somewhere.  They’re at the same table so they can’t complain about that.  And if you seat them on the same side as the troublemakers, so they’re facing your FI’s family, then less trouble is likely to be started because it’s much more difficult to have a conversation with someone (or fight with someone) who’s 5 people down from them.  Make sense?  Rectangle table setups are also a big thing right now so no one will realize that’s why you did the setup that way!   Example: http://weddingpeephole.blogspot.com/2008/12/super-extra-long-tables.html


Post # 9
2100 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Do you have to use assigned seating?  I also have a challenging family (my mother is already assigned to keep my sister away from me before the ceremony since she ruined my last wedding) and I figure they will do what they will do.  I cannot figure out who should sit with whom and since I am having an afternoon tea not a formal party that people can sit where they want and for 2.5 hours we can endure each other and well if they make a scene all i can do is shrug and say you cannot pick your relatives 🙂

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