PMS Vent.. Does love wax and wane?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Please answer :)
    My love for my SO is constant/increases day-by-day! : (6 votes)
    11 %
    My love for my SO can be up and down, but it's mostly up!! : (28 votes)
    49 %
    My love for my SO can be up and down, but it's mostly down :( : (0 votes)
    I have experienced the 'numbness' you've described, but it was only temporary : (13 votes)
    23 %
    I'm exactly the same.. PMS is a bitch :( : (6 votes)
    11 %
    Have an internet hug!!! : (4 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 3
    258 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @im_an_anon_weddingbee_user:  Big Internet Hugs!!! I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. I can’t offer any advice on the numbness – I’ve never experienced that and I can’t really relate, but I did want to offer one piece of advice on him being “almost” perfect: No One Is Perfect. Seriously, if you try to find a perfect man, you’ll be alone forever. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty flawed myself.


    I think the trick is finding someone who’s flaws you can live with, and aren’t dealbreakers. I’m messy and a bit of a packrat, and my husband likes everything in its place. I know it drives him nuts when I leave stuff out, and I do make an effort to keep things organized, but it doesn’t always happen. He realizes that in the grand scheme of things, a little clutter is not going to make or break our marriage.


    His patronizing sounds awful, but it also sounds like something he could work on if he cared to. Have an honest conversation (without yelling maybe?) to try to work out a calm way you can let him know when he is doing that. And while you’re in the conversation, offer him an opportunity to let him know if there’s anything he’d like you to work on. Maybe then it’d feel more fair to him. Good luck!!

    Post # 4
    7282 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @im_an_anon_weddingbee_user:  I encourage you to see a doctor. I don’t think what you are describing is PMS but sounds more like depression.

    You should also talk to your FI about how you are feeling. Try not to use accusational language but try using statements like when this happens it makes me feel ……….

    Post # 5
    3778 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I think love changes throughout a relationship. It goes from that instant chemistry (heart racing and weak knees), to fondness, to companionship, to deep love. Not in that order… but it is a constant flux. Never is it the same. So I don’t think it’s practical to expect to feel the same exact way physically or emotionally towards your spouse.

    Post # 6
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    I think this is one of those things where you are allowing yourself to focus in the negative, and allowing that negativity to cast a pall over everything.  It’s like this (except you don’t hate your FI, you are just indifferent to him).

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