Post # 1
Your friend shows you a picture of herself in a beautiful dress/outfit/whatever. She looks great, and you love the outfit. But you know she would look SO much better with spanx on underneath. Trouble is, you are pretty fit and she is not, really. So you can’t suggest it like, “Oh, I use these and they’re so great!”
So how do you suggest it politely? Without sounding like you’re saying, “You are lumpy and fat and need something to hold you in” but more like, “You look great, and this will make you look absolutely perfect!”
Post # 3
@Tangled: Does your friend like the way she looks in the outfit? If so, you don’t say anything.
Post # 4
I agree with the PP if she is happy and comfortable ( and we all know how uncomfortable spanx are, I would personally rather go without) then I wouldn’t say anything.
Post # 5
@Tangled: I wouldn’t say anything. If she is happy, let her wear it with the confidence that no amount of spanx could rival.
Post # 6
Is there a paintyline or seam somewhere? Spanx is great for smoothing. Without saying fat I would use that word somehow.
Post # 7
@Tangled: Oh my. There is no way to “politely” suggest Spanx. Please don’t say anything to her like that. You have your opinion, fine, but it would certainly hurt her feelings deeply. If one of my friends said that to me I would never forgive her, lol. It would be extremely rude, please don’t do that.
Besides, if she’s like me she may have a Spanx phobia. I despise those things – to me they’re the most uncomfortable thing ever invented on the planet. I can’t wear one for more than 15 minutes. I once peeled one off in a public restroom and thew it in the trash, what a waste of $60, lol. 😉
Post # 8
@Tangled: Even fit/slim people wear Spanx. I’d say “it worked wonders for me”. All the celebs wear it and they’re usually pretty fit too.
Could you go clothes shopping or something with her, and then if she’s like most chicks, she’ll start picking herself apart and you could be like “well Spanx is awesome.. it would totally fix X, Y, Z problem”.
Post # 9
There is absolutely no polite way to suggest it without hurting her feelings, ESPECIALLY if you are thinner/fitter than she is. I would just not say anything.
Post # 10
Yeah, I’m with the majority of the previous posters. I would not mention Spanx to her whatsoever unless she specifically ASKED me for advice on how to get a smoother silhouette. If she’s not asking, I would simply compliment her on the nice outfit and leave it at that. I would hate to undermine a friend’s self-confidence!
Post # 11
Seriously, don’t say anything, if a woman feels beautiful, she is and that all goes down the drain the minute her friend tells her it looks like two pigs are fighting under a blanket when she wears that dress.
Post # 12
There’s not a way to politely suggest it.
Post # 13
yeah i don’t think there’s a polite way to do this. As long as she is happy with the way she looks that’s all that matters.
Post # 14
I’m with others. There’s no way to politely suggest it, unfortunately. Even though you have good intentions, the suggestion will hurt her feelings.
Post # 15
I think the pantyline suggestion was the only thing that could actually work. That was a good idea!
My friend is happy enough with the way she looks, but she’s definitely self concious about it. You ladies have confirmed what I was thinking, that there is no polite way to do it. So I will just keep my mouth shut.
I just feel awful for her. She has a thyroid issue. She has worked SO hard to lose weight for years. She eats healthy, has a job where she exercises all day, and still nothing. It’s really not fair. 🙁 Suggesting Spanx would definitely not make her feel better about that, which is why I was trying to think of a way to do it without being insulting. I think they would really change her whole look in her wedding dress.
Post # 16
Maybe she just didn’t have on Spanx in that picture but she plans on wearing them. I have a pair and only wear them when I absolutely have to – which means I wouldn’t wear them while casually shopping regardless if I happened to try on a dress while I was out.
I agree with PP; there is no polite way to say that and I don’t think you should, especially since as you mentioned, you and your friend are NOT built the same. For example, I am plus-size and I talk openly with my other plus-size friends about the wonders that body shapers can do and I would have no problem asking one of those friends if they plan on wearing Spanx with that outfit. HOWEVER, I have been offended before when one of my skinny friends has said (in a not-so-nice tone) “please tell me you’re going to wear something with that dress!”… um, rude much?! Guess it really depends on your friendship dynamic, but as a general rule – do NOT mention anything to your friend.