Post # 1
A few of our guests are backing out of our wedding at the last minute, after they RSVPed “yes” weeks ago. Their reasoning is bogus to me (along the lines of “my spouse and I won’t know anyone there,) but I’m curious if my annoyance to this is warranted, or if I’m just being bridal crazy.
Post # 3
@asc341: I would be thrown off by that sort of excuse, particularly if final numbers had been submitted to the caterer. Emergencies happen though, and I wouldn’t be upset if there was a legitimate reason.
Post # 4
@asc341: unless something really serious and unexpected came up that is just out of their control and they just could not have planned for, i’d totally be annoyed. its like these people don’t understand that there is a deadline for a reason, and after that point you are locked into paying for them even if they don’t show up! ugh!
Post # 5
It’s both rude and lame to RSVP “yes” and then back out on the grounds of not knowing anyone! I don’t think anyone can reasonably take offence when emergencies happen. Two of my evening guests failed to turn up, one because he’d just been diagnosed with viral meningitis and the other because his son was taken to Accident & Emergency (ER to you US bees!) earlier that day. I was much more worried for them than I was their lack of attendance.
But lame, late excuses are the pits!
Post # 6
@asc341: ANNOYING!!! I had people changing their rsvps the week of like crazy… luckily I had a venue that thankfully let me change it up until a few days bfr. HOWEVER, I am so miffed at several ppl who ended up no showing….no reasoning for most, some had super lame excuses (like got called into work out in the field….THE WEEK BFR…meaning they could have called and told us????) our wedding cost us roughly 150+ a person….so x 8 people thats a LOT of money wasted on pure ignorance.
lol…sorry….I had’nt vented about that yet
Post # 7
We only had one person back out and never got a reason. My cousin RSVPd for two adults and two kids (HA, I just realized that I have no idea if they even got their kids’ meals), and showed up without her husband (though she said “plus one,” though her husband was invited). Booooooooooooo.
Post # 8
Yeah it’s rude unless it is a very legitimate reason (health, death, accident, you know some emergency).
Post # 9
@asc341: thats a really stupid excuse. I went to a wedding where I knew no one except my FI. We ended up having a great time because everyone at the table was conversing. At a wedding, those situations will happen, but after a little while, everyone gets warmed up and someone at the table will start a conversation that everyone can be involved in.
Post # 10
Thats a super lame excuse. Sounds like they would have known that when they RSVPed. They could have said “We can’t afford it / Going to another wedding that day” If you don’t know anyone there you still have your spouse. Lame!
Post # 11
I’m glad I’m not alone on this!
Post # 12
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I had a couple people do this, for semi legitimate reasons. Although it’s “technically” rude, I was just so incredibly happy that whole weekend that I couldn’t be bothered to give a shit. Hopefully you’ll feel the same way 🙂
Post # 13
I don’t think it’s rude. You are not obligated to attend and if something more important comes up, then so be it. Life happens. I’d deal with it and move on.
Post # 14
@MrsPanda99: There are surely more important things to think about the week of your wedding, but when a guest tells me last minute that they won’t go because they don’t know any other guests, it’s hard to imagine that in their case, something more important came up!
Also, I don’t think that the lack of obligation gives one the green light to bypass curteousy. Call me old fashioned. 🙂
Post # 15
@asc341: Just because you don’t like someone’s reason doesn’t make it any less valid for them. You can’t control other people or judge them by your own standards. Everyone is different.
Post # 16
We had this happen. I didn’t mind that one person couldn’t make it because her sitter backed out at literally the last minute but I had someone else who couldn’t get off of work apparently. That was really irritating as I think you would know ahead of time whether you can get it off or not.