CapitolBee: I’ve had relationships that ‘space’ meant breakup. But with Darling Husband, we actually broke-up one time at the 5 month mark. I was unemployed and had all the time in the world AND I was madly in love with him. I was doing my best to not show it, but when you are in love, it’s hard. Darling Husband at the time, was weary since he was divorced and got into a crazy relationship right after the divorce. So I was a little intense…
So he broke up with me, but still wanted to be friends. I said okay, but was going to wait 8 weeks. I would be friends for 8 weeks. If he still wanted to be only friends after that, I was walking away (I read in a great book called “Getting to I Do” that sometimes it takes guy a few weeks to get their head out of their a$$–my words, not the authors).
But there are a few things you need to do:
1) change your voice mail message so he cant get a hit off your voice (you need to make him miss you)
2) wait 24 hours to respond to any of his call/text. And dont contact him. And when you do talk, make it short (less than 20 mins) and nothing serious–do not talk about the relationship–UGH (And it wasnt an issue for us then, but I would be tempted to either block him from FB (again to make him miss you and have to seek you out) or use FB to show what a wonderful fabulous life you are having without him–take a page from Princess Kate who suddenly was pictured all over town having a blast after her break up with Prince William)
3) If you do see him, no physical touch. Maybe a hug, but no cuddling or kissing. AND def NO SEX!!!!! But make sure you look smoking hot! He needs to long to be with you again.
If after 8 weeks, he isn’t begging you to get back together, then it is time to move on.
So when Darling Husband broke up with me, I was devestated. But kept up a brave face around him. I did all of the things above, except one (I’ll explain later). So within a day or so he was emailing me regularly (and I was waiting to respond). Took him a few days, but he was calling me every 2-3 days (down from every day), but I wouldnt answer and would call him back the next day and only talk for a little bit (only long enough to tell him all the awesome things I was doing without him–which I had to force myself to do because I was miserable and heartbroken). He took one weekend off from seeing me immediately after the breakup, then the next weekend he wanted to meet for lunch and see a movie—I think we huged, but no physical touch. (we saw each other every weekend after that, even just to have lunch) This lasted 4 weeks. During the last week, I could tell his resolve was weakening, so I did allow some cuddling while we were watching TV on the couch–but nothing sexual. By the next weekend he was begging me to get back together and couldnt wait to kiss me.
So, yes, getting back together can happen, not it is not comon. But in my experience, he is showing you in small ways that he is kinda still interested, but torn. If he says he wants a break and doesnt contact you for the whole 10 days, that doesnt bode well. And if he came back all ready to get back together, I would be suspicious that he was interested in another woman, used those 10 days to test the water and it didnt work out, so now he is with you again.