(Closed) Post-Wedding Regret :(

posted 9 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
6010 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I understand, maygirl.  Although it wasn’t my dress I was disappointed about, there were a few things that happened that have kinda stuck with me.  Nothing is perfect, and even though I really loved my wedding, there were definitely some upsets that make me sad. 

If you already have your pictures back from the photographer, can you just put them away for a little while?  Post-wedding has been really emotional for me; it’s like I’m still coming down from the adrenaline and emotional rush of the wedding.  ๐Ÿ™‚  Whenever one of my wedding disappointemtns pops into my head, I try to just distract myself from it instead of dwelling on it.  If you put your pics away for a little while, you may be able to come back to them in a few weeks or months and feel better about how you looked in your dress instead of being depressed.  Just give yourself a little time to come down from the post-wedding rush, and you might be able to look at it from a new perspective.

Post # 4
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2008

Hi there,

 I can relate to your situation.  Here’s my story:

 One of my best friends is engaged too.  She already has her wedding date, but i don’t.  She wanted to look for wedding dresses together, so I went and thought it would be fun.  While trying on dresses we met other brides who told us about trunk shows and that we should check them out.  I got a high from trying on dresses so that night I decided to search for trunk shows and book appointments.  The next day I had an appointment, and only my parent’s and grandmother could come with me.  I tried on several dresses and I tried on this one particular dress that I thought was nice but my parents loved it.  They thought I should buy it, even though I didn’t have a wedding date, but because I would save 10% off from the trunk show.  So I bought it. 

 

This was in December 2008.  I still don’t have a wedding date, but it will most likely be Spring of 2010.  The dress is beautiful, but I feel like I will regret not trying on other dresses and looking for the "One".  I too, don’t think it photographs nicely.  When I think about my dress, I think its  "ok", but I still dream of getting a show stopper dress. 

I don’t blame anyone but myself for my stupidity.  I still ponder getting another dress, but my parent’s think I’m crazy and that the dress is the most beautiful dress they’ve seen.  But to me, it doesn’t feel right.  I still want to look.  Maybe its just being a bride and that I’m very indecisive.  But I still can’t fathom wasting all that money, especially in this economy. 

 If you could go back, would you buy another dress?  If you did what dress would you have gotten?  What would you have done with the other dress? 

Post # 5
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

I have to say….although I LOVED my dress and still LOVE my dress – there are still times when I see gorgeous gowns and think "Maybe I should have worn that dress…"

No matter how much you like your wedding dress – there will always be other beautiful dresses out there that will catch your eye.  Let’s be honest – it’s not easy to choose just ONE dress to wear on your one and only wedding day when there are SO many gorgeous gowns out there.  You just have to pick one and go with it.  

And like PP’s mentioned – there is always something that goes wrong or you are disapointed about at your wedding.  There were little things that i cringe about when I see/hear them.  So, don’t worry too much – I’m sure everyone there thought you looked divine!

Post # 6
Member
22 posts
Newbee

That’s the reason my wife had two dresses at our wedding. She first bought a dress that she liked but she wasn’t in love with. Then, right before the wedding she found a dress that she felt in love with and bought that one too. She ended up wearing both of them ๐Ÿ™‚

 

The first one for the ceremony and first part of the reception since it was more traditional and the second one for the remaining part of the reception.

Post # 7
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I know how you feel. My dress isn’t my dream dress, but I was more motivated by price than anything. The dress I wanted cost way more than I was willing to spend (not necessarily because of my budget – I’m just a cheapskate), so I went with the cheapest one I found. I’m hoping I won’t look back and regret it.

One possible idea: A friend of mine had something of a wedding day photo disaster. Almost none of her pictures from the ceremony turned out, and she just wasn’t satisfied with the ones from the reception. So, she went to a local bridal boutique, picked out the dress of her dreams and rented it. Her husband rented a tux and they had a photographer friend take a bunch of pictures of them. It sounds kind of contrived, but looking at these pictures now, I would never guess that they weren’t from her actual wedding day. 

Post # 8
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee

I got two dresses and I’m not sure if I’m going to sell one and wear the other or wear both.  My mom thinks I’m insane, but the first dress I bought didn’t look exactly the way I envisioned it to when I took pictures.  The second one however I love, even though my mom doesn’t like it.  She thinks it looks cheap, but I honestly think it fits better then the first dress and I love it.

I am still waiting for both dresses to come in, so I guess I’m make my final choice once they’re both altered.  It’s good to know I wasn’t the only one who had doubts about the dress I bought the first time around.

Post # 9
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I love my dress, it’s exactly what I have been drawing for years and has a bustle; it’ll be hard ot dance in though

I dont want to get another dress because I want to be a bride

Post # 10
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I was also blinded by the 10% off trunk show discount and bought a dress that was not my dream dress.  I knew I wanted a dress with either lace or beading, and this dress had neither- it was just plain white with a jeweled belt.  A week later I bought my dream dress, so now I am out over $2K –

I do not regret getting the second dress but I wish I was not so rushed when I bought the first one!  Anyone want to buy a brand new Priscilla of Boston platinum dress? haha

Post # 11
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

Maygirl – I had bought a dress and decided it wasn’t me at all. I was sucked in by the price and basically bought it because it was on sale. Anyway I knew that if I wore it I’d regret it. Your post made me decide to sell it and get another one. I just sold it last night, at a loss, and I am so happy it’s gone. Thank you for getting me to make the right choice.

Post # 12
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I actually hate my dress. It was supposed to be a replica of a Martin McCrea dress and it came out horribly, no refund or return either. I have a friend who is trying to make it more wearable, but instead of being the dress of my dreams, it just makes me want to cry and I can’t afford to buy another dress.

Post # 13
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I’m not married yet, but I’m not in love with my dress either.  While I could have afforded a dress that was much more, I settled for one that looked pretty good and had an even better price tag.

Post # 14
Member
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

My wedding is upcoming too, and I had a very hard time looking for a dress. I decided that I probably wasn’t going to find the perfect dress, as I didn’t even know what it would look like. I figured there probably are a few designs out there that I can make work, and all I had to do is find one of them. My dress is fine, it was a clean sample dress so it wasn’t the steal of the century but, sure, I bought it because of the small discount. It’s ivory, but part of me wishes it were white, etc. Lots of little things. But, to compensate, I’m jazzing it up with a pretty veil for the ceremony, and I got a rehearsal dress that I really like too. If you consider the other fashion pieces in addition to the dress, does it make you feel better? Some girls really love their shoes…

Post # 15
Member
9 posts
Newbee

My brother’s fiance is very motivated by budget, and I am afraid she is going to buy the first thing with a low price tag (she has an enviously adorable figure, so lots of things will look wonderful on her) and then regret it as she looks at other dresses during their 1.5 year engagement.  Any advice as I shop with her?

Post # 16
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am having such a difficult time shopping for a dress, and reading all these posts really makes me feel better.  I wish I could write something that would make those of you who regret your dress feel better, but all I can think to say is to just give it time. 

My best friend is also engaged and we have been having a lot of talks about the stresses that come with trying to orchestrate perfection over the course of an entire day; it’s impossible.  The perfection really has to be in your choice of husband because he’s the one who will make you feel beautiful for the rest of your life.  

Why not go to David’s Bridal, buy a cheap and sexy gown and hire a local photographer to take some ‘trash the dress’ shots?   

 

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