Post # 1
- Wedding: February 2014 - The Fennes
I got married in February this year and it was the best day. I had 4 months to plan one of the most important days of my life and ever since that day I always think was it the best it could be/ did I look like the gorgeous bride I could have been. I am getting myself so worked up over the fact that I looked like an awful bride- I picked the wrong dress for my figure, my make up wasn’t good enough and neither was my hair. My husband tells me I looked stunning on our day but i am still getting myself so worked up.
Has anyone else felt like this? How did you stop these awful thoughts?
thank you leanne x
Post # 2
I haven’t gone through this myself because I’m not married yet, but I know that what you’re feeling isn’t unusual.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read posts on this site about how a bride thinks she looked awful or that she didn’t do enough to make her wedding look good. More often than not, her feelings, while understandable, are just not correct. These brides tend to look beautiful, and their dresses look just right on them. Their wedding decor tends to look great; so nice, in fact, that people get ideas for their own wedding.
Oftentimes, people are their own worst critics. I think that’s what’s going on with you. I haven’t seen pictures of your wedding, but based on other posts I’ve read that sound like yours, I’ll guess that you and your wedding look much better than you think they do. The wedding wasn’t that long ago, so I think with a little more time you’ll start to see it for what it really was, and you won’t feel about it the way you do now; you’ll see how beautiful everything really was.
To get past this, just give yourself some time to let everything sink in; time will probably make a big difference. Also, remember that the goal of the wedding was for you and your fiancé to get married, and that goal was accomplished. That truly is the most important part.
Besides, there will always be anniversary parties and vow renewals, so you can use the decor and wear the style of dress you want later. You don’t have to wait a bunch of years either. Celebrating your marriage can be done anytime you and your husband feel like it.
Post # 3
I’m sure this is just the come down after all the stress as I’ve spoken to so many people who said they had the same thoughts after their wedding day! For me it was the invitations… “They cost too much and still could of been better”… ?!?! Why even worry after the event?! It’s just nitpicking with the benefit of hindsight. It’s like a strange punishment we put upon ourselves! I’m sure you looked absolutely fabulous 🙂
Post # 4
LeanneMarie: I know exactly how you feel. I loved our day the day of, thought it was perfect. but, looking back I wish I coul dhave a do over and the regret feeeling sucks. However, I moved on because there is too much going on in my life to dwell about it. I will admit that its difficult looking back on it. I try to just remember the good things about the day, most importantly, that I married the love of my life!
Post # 5
Is that profile pic you? If so you have nothing to worry about!
Post # 6
Remind yourself that what’s done is done, and none of it changes the outcome. You are married, and it is the marriage that matters, not the wedding. We are harder on ourselves than anyone else usually is, and I am willing to be that everyone who attended your wedding thought you were a beautiful bride. Your DH loves you and thought you looked great, and that’s really all that matters.
Post # 7
- Wedding: February 2014 - The Fennes
Thank you all for your kind comments. I will take your advice and stop dwelling on the past, I cannot change these things and I really do need to accept them. I truly am my worst critic. I just need to learn to do that now….
i did have the best day of my life, I married my soulmate and i couldn’t be happier about that. he however thinks I am crazy- he cannot see what was wrong with my look on our wedding day- it’s just my silly brain! Hee Hee
its hard because my family never really got upset because I had found THE dress, and I always think is that because they never really liked it and just didn’t want to tell me. My dress was a mermaid/fish tail, I decided that as I had managed to lose a lot of weight I was going to show off my new slimmer figure, but i now my mum always wanted me to have a princess dress. I look back and think should I have gone with what she liked, as the saying goes mums are usually right
Post # 8
- Wedding: February 2014 - The Fennes
sorry it seems as though I posted halfway through typing….
i will take all your advice and stop dwelling on things that I cannot change, what is done is done and I need to enjoy my marriage
thank you you for all your lovely comments, I really appreciate it.
i will attached a few pictures for you all.
Post # 9
If I look half as good on my wedding day I will be delighted! Really really love your hair.
Post # 10
jofits: agreed! OP you looked stunning!
Post # 11
LeanneMarie: i can understand how you feel, although for different reasons. I wasn’t happy with my photographer and have been sulking all day again about not getting a full frontal shot of my dress. I don’t have any full length shots. Im so crabby that I didn’t get a shot of just me in my dress just like the ones you have just posted! I’d love to have just one pic like yours 🙁 I thought I was starting to get over it, but suddenly today i was getting down about it again! I need help too! Lol. I felt super stressed on my wedding day and can’t say I really enjoyed it. Kind of wish we eloped!
Post # 12
LeanneMarie: You looked absolutely beautiful! Don’t bring yourself down for no reason! 🙂
Post # 13
LeanneMarie: your husband is right, you are crazy. You look perfect in the photos: your makeup is flawless, your hair fabulous, your dress is gorgeous and perfect for your body (you have a great figure, so most deesses probably would’ve looked good but that one fits you beautifully, plus it is so pretty and classy). Also the pops of red look really nice.
Honestly I think you have some serious self-esteem issues if you can’t see how stunning you looked. Every time a negative thought enters your head try to recognise it as being totally irrational. Just acknowledge the crazy and move along. Then post more photos of your beautiful wedding for us.
Post # 14
LeanneMarie: You look gorgeous! I think you have what I call “wedding blog disease”. Expectations for weddings these days are SO insanely high. I mean, who says that it has to be the BEST DAY EVER with the BEST FOOD EVER, the BEST HAIR EVER, the BEST DRESS EVER, the BEST VENUE EVER, etc. It’s like a system designed to make you feel bad if you aren’t a billionaire with five dress changes and a guest list of 300 people.
You probably spent a ton of money on one day, and then it was all over in a flash. It’s so much expectation and planning and excitement, then after that day your life just goes back to normal.
My advice: for now, take our words for it (and your husband’s) that you looked great, and step away from the wedding blogs. No more looking at dresses you might have liked, or replaying the day and choices. Just forget about everything weddings for like a month. Don’t even look at your pictures! After a month pull them out and look, I bet you’ll feel a lot better.
Post # 15
you look stunning!! I hope I look as beautiful as you on my wedding day!