- 5 years ago
- Wedding: February 2013
I knew this would come up eventually in our pre-marital course we’re doing through our church. I just wish it hadn’t come up the second week of the class. I’m talking about the sex part of the course. How we should keep ourselves pure until marriage. Well, honeys, I’m not pure sexually. I have a past, I currently live with my fiance, in all aspects of the word, and I do not have a problem with it. I struggled with this for a time when I was dating other men and went through it when I started seriously dating my FI because I am the first serious relationship he’s had. First everything. We’ve talked through everything and we’re okay with where we are as a couple and are reconciled to “living in sin.”
I was raised in the church and I know there are still a lot of people who believe that I’m heading to hell because I’m sleeping with my FI before we’re married. I respect people’s choices to wait until marriage (I thought I’d be one of them) but I don’t like the insinuation that I need to stop having sex with my FI in order to have a proper marriage. Sigh…that’s all this is. Just one big sigh against the institution.
No one we know is judging us (at least not to our faces) and my FI feels better about going into marriage having lived together for nearly a year. Well, this week’s topic is just one week and we’ll move on to something else tomorrow. There’s also a purity pledge in the workbook that we’re supposed to sign…not happening. What are your thoughts, bees, on abstinence or living with your SO before marriage? Any judgmental attitudes show their ugly faces? I do know my mom was sad when she found out we were living together and not sleeping in separate rooms, but she’s never been rude about it.