(Closed) Pre-teen and "that menstruation" talk

posted 5 years ago in Parenting
Post # 3
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I can’t think of the name of it right now, but my mother gave me a book (similar to those Mothercare ones, just not as thick) that covered everything about puberty, relationships, sex, etc. If I can remember the damn name of it, I’ll let you know! sorry!

Post # 4
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think it would be a good idea to keep some pads handy in the house, and let her know that they are there and make sure she does know how to use them, see if she has any questions etc.

Here’s a good site for teens starting their period, written for their perspective: http://www.kidzworld.com/article/816-getting-your-first-period

Post # 5
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Sorry, doube post!

Post # 6
Member
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

I have a 10 year old and they  started this talk in school last year, so I talked to her before then so she would get it from me. American girl makes a really good book about caring for their body and it goes over puberty in a couple chapters. It breaks down the changes they will see and how to use different personal care products. It talks about deodarant and odor and stuff like that too. It was highly reccomended to me and I have to say it was a great tool to get the two of us talking and trying to keep it casual so she wasn’t embarrassed to ask questions or talk about it.

Post # 7
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

As pp mentioned, my mom also gave me a book that explained a lot about puberty, which was helpful. She also bought pads, which I would definitely recommend doing soon. 

Post # 8
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I would suggest talking to her soon since it’s getting close.  My mom didn’t say anything, so I was so embarrassed that I hid it for several months.  Open communication is key!

Kidshealth.org is a great resource.

Post # 9
Member
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think making her the packet with supplies is a great idea! One of my worries when I was younger was not having something to use if I needed it. I got my period before all my friends so I felt sort of alone. 

I also had a book that explained everything. I think it might have been made by American Girl, not even sure if they still make it. I liked getting the book because I felt the whole thing was so embarassing that sitting down for a talk would honestly have killed me. So my mom gave me the book and let me know she was available for questions. She made sure I knew where the pads were in the house so I could get them without asking (& dying of embarassment). I was clearly very easily embarassed! haha

Edit: I think this was the book I had! here

Post # 10
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@jmaze:  Now probably is the right time to have this conversation. My daughter is almost 9 and I’m dreading this a little bit, because I’m not sure how to begin. I’m definitely interested in other poster’s suggestions of books and things too!

Post # 12
Member
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

@kittyface:  I think it was so much harder for me to start the conversation  than it was for her. I got the book and kind of showed it to her. I told her that she is getting older and her body is going to go though some changes and I wanted her to know that they were normal and what to expect. As she read through the book we would talk about what she was reading.  A lot of times she would bring the book and ask me about a part of it. I think the open communication was the most important thing, so that she feels ok talking about it and when it happens hopefully it won’t be so embarassing.

Post # 14
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

My mom gave me a book. I think it was free from Kotex?

I also got a box of “supplies”. Overnight pads, tampons, liners, regular pads. That box made it feel special and exciting. Like it really was a gift I was getting for grown ups. I ended up only using tampons from like day #2, but it was good to have options! I like the idea of making her a kit that she can carry around in her purse or put in her locker (that way she can help her friends too).

I was 10 when I got mine and I wasn’t the first girl in the class. NO WAY was I going to listen to my mom, but the book explained a lot! I still have the book and plan to give it to my daughter some day. Something else no one explained to me was that it wouldn’t regulate for years. When I was 10-13 I would get it about every 3 months.

Post # 15
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@jmaze:  I got that book for my daughter too!  And Deenee.

I have a 14 year old and we talked about it right before the 5th grade health unit when they discuss it with the kids at school.  Her whole life I have been very open about what a tampon is and why I am using it, etc.  I too was raised with zero information and now feel that more information is better, especially if it comes from you!  My daughter had a little pouch with some pads in it in her locker at school and in her bag just in case.  It was surprising how easy it was to transition her to using stuff when she got it(this year, she’s tiny!).  Don’t forget to talk to her about hygeine i.e. washing face, deoderant, changing, wearing clean clothes.  Can’t tell you how many pre-teen girls(I teach dance) have horrible BO cause no one said “Hey!  Put on some deoderant!”

Post # 16
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Poor thing 🙁

I had cramps, headaches, and all the PMS symptoms at 9 years old. It was horrendous to go through alone because my mom had no idea that it was possible for such a young girl to get her period that early in life. Now it’s becoming much more common. Definitely talk to her about it and let her know you are available for questions if needed but try not to make it “too big” of a thing in case she is super embarassed about it like I was. Definitely love the packet idea! Maybe in there also include one dose of ibuprofen? In case her cramps get heavy. 

 

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