(Closed) Pregnant sister/MOH

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

Did your sister tell you she was pregnant before or after you set the date?

If she told you she was pregnant after you set a date, it would have been natural to have the when are you due conversation then.  Obviously you want your sister to be at the wedding, which means you might have to move your date. 

Talk to you sister – ask her when she is due and then talk to her about your wedding.  I’m sure she wants to be there for you. 

If you just set a date last weekend, and haven’t found a venue, it should be easy to move the date.  I know its not ideal, but not having your sister at your wedding isn’t ideal either. 

Good Luck!

Post # 4
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee

I’m sorry about the bad timing! Fortunately it does sound like it’s early enough in the planning process to choose another date. Just remember, your sister didn’t control her due date! I think changing the date so that it’s sufficiently far away from her due date is probably a good idea for both of you. 

Post # 5
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Sorry to hear that…that’s definitely a bummer. I wouldn’t freak out and start changing everything yet though. Is this your sister’s first pregnancy? Because most first borns are late. I would wait for her doctor to give her the real estimate as they know better than we do 🙂

Just as an example – my BM (and she’s my best friend), her sister just got pregnant and we thought she would be due the week before or of my wedding. I got nervous my BM wouldn’t be able to go because it’s a destination wedding and this would be her first niece or nephew. Turns out when she actually went to the doctor, she isn’t due until 2 weeks AFTER my wedding and again, will probably still be late. Our math wasn’t quite accurate 🙂

Post # 6
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2011

You are not being selfish – I completely understand how you feel.  Around the time I got engaged, my sister started talking about trying to have another baby (she’s my MOH too).  Internally, I was kind of pissed, I didn’t want her to be really pregnant or have a newborn around my wedding day for a lot of reasons. She’s pregnant now too, but she’ll clear my wedding date.  All this being said, I am REALLY happy for her and can’t wait for my second nephew/niece to arrive! 

Your situation is definitely a tough one.  I don’t think you should change around you date though.  I would talk to her about it some more to figure out what the due date really is.  I would say that there is a good chance that it will actually all work out.  The probability of her going into labor on your wedding day is probably not that high.  She’ll probably go before (in which case you’ll have a beautiful new family member to share your special date with!) or, she’ll go after and just be a little big in pictures…nothing you can do about that but just enjoy her company.  This is your day, and I think you should should keep that in mind and let the other things fall around that as they may.  It will all work out.

Post # 7
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’m sorry, you’re not being selfish–I would be upset too!

Post # 8
Member
792 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I think you may be jumping the gun by changing the date so soon. I would wait and find out what her actual due date is… pregnancy lasts more like ten months! Also- will she need to travel to get to your wedding? Because if they have to travel far then yeah, she’s probably not going to make it, but if she’s close by it may not be a big deal.

Post # 9
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’m sorry that stinks. I’ve got two BMs (one is my MOH) that are pregnant and they both are high risk pregnancies and both aren’t quite sure they’ll participate in my wedding because of it. My wedding is next week so I”m a little bummed. They both aren’t going to stay the night with me on Friday or participate in the Day Spa activities on Saturday pre-wedding.  I reserved us a plush suite and am doing hair and nails at the salon as my gift to them. So it is a little bummer to know that they won’t get to enjoy the fun things of the wedding with me.

But at the same time I don’t want them to be uncomfortable or worried about themselves.  My advice is go ahead and try to move your date if possible to a month later.  My girls are only 4 & 5 months along and they already are having problems.  But some women have zero problems with pregnancy, you just never know.

Post # 10
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, but I hate to say it, medically most women dont know that they are pregnant until they are anywhere between 4 and 6 weeks along, the majority the latter.  So she probably didn’t know a week ago when you picked your date.  If she’s like 3 months or more you could be really upset, but it seems like it was just bad ultimate timing.  So sorry, I hope you work it out.

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